The InstiKater

Pete's arrival

2011-11-05T11:56:00.001-04:00

Pete’s due date was Sunday, October 30. Not only was I certain I’d have him before then, but I was sure he’d be such a quick birth, like Henry, I was afraid of having him in my pants! I was getting pretty impatient with his arrival and was up Thursday, Nov. 3 at about 4 am. No contractions, just couldn’t sleep. When Dave got up at 5 for a run I told him to go ahead and run far away as nothing was going to happen here!

At 6:49 I woke up with the first contraction and I thought, “oh, I remember what this feels like: Pain”. I waited and timed them and they seemed to get more intense and closer, but it wasn’t too bad. I called Dave at work (he’d put in about a 25 minute workday thus far) and had him come home at 7:20.

He got Mary, from next door, to stay with the kids who weren’t up yet and I called my mom to drive from Muskegon and we left for the hospital. My contractions were around 4 minutes apart and definitely getting intense!

We arrived at 8 am (easy to remember times when you’re timing contractions) but were in triage for over an hour as they monitored my contractions. They were concentrated in my back and were getting pretty painful, though not moving closer together. The nurse checked me when we came in and I was at about a 4. We suspected the baby was face-up so I tried hands and knees, but I was terrified they’d send me home as my water had not broken and the contractions still were not moving closer. I was afraid I wasn’t “in labor”

At about 9:20 she checked me and I was at 4.5 so I was technically in labor and making cervical change. They wheeled me into delivery and I started asking for an epidural right away! I wanted a natural birth, like Henry’s, because the recovery is so much easier, but I could tell that I just wasn’t having a similar labor and like Charlotte, who was face up, I didn’t think I’d make any progress with the back labor without the epidural.

At about 10:15 I got the epidural and aside from a nick to my nerve in my right leg (shooting pains and kick was the result), that went well. Suddenly, that back pain went away! But it also revealed the uterine contractions that had been there the whole time that I didn’t even notice with that back pain. Let me tell you, back labor is serious stuff! The uterine contractions I totally could have handled. But since it was in anyway, we turned it up a bit to dull that ☺

The on-call doctor came in about 11:30 and I was only at a 7 and my water hadn’t broken yet and my doc would able to come a little after noon, so we decided to wait for her. She arrived about 12:30 and checked me and as she did we discussed breaking my bag of waters when it broke! That was easy. I was at a 9 or so and she went to change her clothes.

By this point, I could start feeling much more in the uterine contractions and could tell that things were changing. She got back about 12:45 (as I was getting uncomfortable and sassy) and then we could finally this on the road. I pushed with 3 or 4 contractions, for a total of about 20 minutes. But it was strange because my contractions never got closer; they were still 4 minutes apart. Very glad for that epi when he was in the birth canal- I remember that part with Henry and having to wait almost 4 minutes between pushes would have been bad!

At 1:09 pm, he came out and it felt so good! Getting that near 10 lbs off my other organs was so nice! His little hand was up right next to his face and the doctor gently unwound the cord that was around his neck and hand. They put him on my chest and I thought “oh good, I DO love you!” and he was just perfect. Dave cut the cord, the doctors did repairs on the 3rd degree tear (apparently along my old Charlotte fault line).

It took a while to get feeling back after the epi was turned off and I was a “fall risk” as my bracelet proclaimed (I faint really easily) so I had to be gurneyed up to recovery around 4 pm.

Pete’s been great! He hard cried at all. He had the mildest form of respiratory distress, which sounded like a tiny Geiger counter. But that cleared up within a day. He’s been sleeping and nursing just beautifully. Charlotte and Henry were so excited to meet him and hold him; it was a joy to see their faces as they looked upon him.

Duck, Duck, GOOSE!

2010-08-19T14:31:00.002-04:00

Last night Charlotte wanted to play a game with me. Henry was in the sandbox and Dave was cleaning up dinner dishes. She said she wanted to play duck duck goose. The following is a transcript of this event.

Kate: Okay, how do you play?
CJ: You sit in a circle and touch peoples heads and say duck and then goose and then you run.
Kate: so do we need another person to play?
CJ: no, we can do it.
[we sit in a "circle" across from each other]
CJ: I'll go first
[stands up and deliberates...wheels turning in mind...]
No, you go first.
Kate: I think we need someone else. go get daddy
[dave and henry join us. CJ wants to play upstairs in our bedroom. we sit on the floor as charlotte goes around us]
CJ: Duck
Henry: Duck [gets up and follows her]
CJ: duck
Henry: duck
CJ: goose! [as she pats Dave's head]
Henry: Goose!
[charlotte runs around the circle, dave gets up to follow her, she completes the circle then keeps going and runs into her room. Henry follows her. Dave follows her. They all come back]
Charlotte: Okay, now your turn, Daddy.
[in a whisper: call me the goose!]

This continued for about 15-20 minutes with Henry refusing to sit down always following whoever was it and repeating duck or goose. The running was in all directions and made little sense or difference whether the person who was it was gotten by the goose. Again, Playing with her is like playing with a drunk person. Just another reason why living with toddlers is like being at a frat party.

The people in your neighborhood

2010-08-10T14:27:00.002-04:00

This afternoon as naptime approached, the kids were bickering over toys and me, so I kicked us outside. I picked some ripe tomatoes and Henry noted that the people 3 doors down had a lawn service doing some weed-wacking. So the kids and I walked down there. On the porch was the man who lived there, Mr. Zazakis. He and his wife, Marina, are from Greece though they've been here in the states since they were in their 20's. They invited the kids in right away and gave them candy. The kids made themselves at home and sat on the couch and then it was sort of awkward when the kids decided to go upstairs. But the Zazakis were so nice and welcoming. They sent me home with some candies from Greece that their daughter, who lives there, brings to them. There is a picture of the Mona Lisa on the wrappers.

I think the kids are learning that every neighbor they visit will offer them treats. What a nice neighborhood where that happens. Yesterday we visited Cele across the street and the kids played with her cats. And of course, yesterday when we got home from grocery shopping Henry got out of the car and started calling for Mary and Bernie. Mary was outside and she gave the kids popsicles. We're like the block moochers. I'm okay with that.

Garden Glory

2009-05-10T16:20:00.003-04:00

It is a little early to really be planting stuff, but it is getting crazy out of control in my house so I transplanted almost all my seedlings today. I made sure to water them well because they looked pretty traumatized from the move. Hopefully they'll perk up soon. I see the sun is peeking out now so they might get a little warmth.

I plan on covering them with old sheets or a plastic tarp at night for the first few nights because I haven't hardened them off yet. In an ideal world, I would have left them outside for a few hours at a time to get used to the outside gradually. But all of a sudden I realized that I had the time to plant them and I needed them out, now!

My tomatoes were so darn leggy, I ended up stripping the bottom 12-18 inches of leaves and burying the stalk in a shallow trench and then tied the top to a stake so that roots will grow out of the stalk. Tomatoes are good like that. I need to buy lots more cages, though. I only had 4 cages because I used my peony cages on my
peonies this year :-)

I tied some twine up to stakes to make a half-assed fence to keep two year olds out of the garden. But I need to buy some more stakes, too. When my irises bloom, I'll really need the stakes for them and for my gladiolas.

Feels so good to be out in the yard and it is looking sharp with our new playset. If only Dave would agree to cut the lawn shorter. He says longer is better for it. That might be true, but it looks unruly to me.

Oh, biggidy-bomb is up so I'll go tend to him now. I'll post pics later.

Relaxing on a sunny day

2009-03-05T15:28:00.002-05:00

I am enjoying a day without a nap. I finally feel good again! About two weeks ago, I got a cold. Then I concurrently got a UTI (thankfully, my dear Dr. Andy was able to prescribe me some stuff since I couldn't get to my doctor). Then Charlotte got some sort of stomach/poop bug that lasted FOUR days. Then as she got better, I got it! But it only lasted a couple of days and Henry never got it.

So I have been napping because I've been sick and miserable. But now I feel pretty good. I worked out today and then we went to see Mary and her new baby, James. He is a peanut! I can't believe babies are so small. Henry looked like Gigantatron next to baby James. My friend Rose also had a baby yesterday, her baby is Elsa. Love that nice german name.

My seed catalog from Henry Fields came today and though I wanted to use burpee (like mom always does), I find this one is slightly cheaper, and so I might use that.

The sun is coming through the windows, the kids are both sleeping and all the world is at peace. Maybe that is the margarita talking. What? A margarita in the middle of the day?? you might ask. BUT, if you think about it, it is the most responsible time for me to drink when I don't have any childcare duties. I just have to be good to nurse at about 5pm. No problem! And though "daytime drinking" is a supposed to be a sign of alcoholism, I can assure you all that I haven't been drinking a whole heck of alot lately. Just too busy/too tired to do much. I go to bed at like 9:30. Last night I stayed up til 10:10 and I thought that was late!

I'd love to post pics, but I"m using my "craptop" and it doesn't have our photos on it, so maybe another time.

Garden Fever!

2009-02-24T15:20:00.002-05:00

Okay, quick update: Henry is getting better and better generally, though Dave still sort of dislikes him and thinks he is difficult. This is not true, he is just a baby. Henry, not Dave. Well, maybe both when it comes to this :-) Found out the hard way that his reflux meds are actually quite important when CJ managed to lose his medicine and he missed two doses and then went nuts the following day. Bought two week supply more for $24 then found the bottle in the pantry. Thanks, Charlotte.

Charlotte is super cute, talks all the time, likes to sing, loves the snow. She stomps one foot into the snow along the driveway all the way down. I'm not sure why this is so interesting, but she's been doing it for months.

On henry's three month birthday we joined the YMCA (they watch kids in childcare center for free with family membership as soon as babies are 3 months old). After some false starts, we found a good rhythm to going and now go 6 days a week at 8:30-10:00. I've lost 10 pounds and several inches and I feel much better!!

Getting out with the two kids is getting easier, or I'm just getting used to it. But I'm getting desperate to get out withOUT the kids and maybe WITH my husband. Need a date night soon!

I'm reading a book called Animal, Vegetable, Miracle about a family who vows to eat only food that is local. They grow much of it themselves on their farm in Virginia (?) and buy local meats. Although I'm not up for that challenge (it is a holy amount of work), I'm super excited about my garden this year!! Last fall I killed a flower bed so I could do more veggies and I'm so glad. I plan to plant lettuce, tomatoes, peppers, beans, onions, garlic, maybe potatoes and I already ahve some strawberries. I'm going to do my best to do it all organically and I have a few books on hold from the library about this. I also plan to try to hit the farmers market as soon as they open this spring and do more local buying and more food from scratch. I'm reading alot about the amount of preservatives and chemicals in our foods and I don't like it! Besides, I enjoy cooking and so does Charlotte. She is a tremendous helper and makes muffins with me about once a week. Now that Henry can sit in the Bumbo on the counter, we can probably do even more! I used my food dryer for the first time since last fall and dried some kiwi. They look awful but taste pretty darn good! I plan to try to do more with tomatoes this fall and dry some and can some and freeze some. I love me my tomatoes and so does Charlotte! I'll have to plant at least three cherry tom plants this year to keep us all satisfied.

Okay, kids still napping (I have them on the same schedule for the afternoon and it was a stroke of brilliance/necessity that I am glad for every single day) so I might get some stuff done.

Much Harder than I thought

2009-01-07T14:43:00.002-05:00

(that's what she said)

So this two kid thing...um...really hard. I don't know if I have ppd or what. If I think I have it, maybe that means I don't, because if I did, then I'd be in denial and not think i had it. I don't know. What are my symptoms? Let's see...mostly just crazy. A vast majority of the time I'm doing okay. I get frustrated or sometimes I"m happy. But about once a day I lose it. Like I really get a little violent with the little guy. I swear alot. Charlotte knows who Jesus Christ is because mommy says it all the time. I like the baby because I can swear a blue streak and he won't repeat it. I wonder if he can sense it when I'm so pissed I'm about to bite him (haven't bitten him yet...well, not hard at least).

This morning I was so tired. I woke up at 1 am and 6:45 to nurse then when I got back into bed, Charlotte was yelling for me. But I refused to get her until 8. So I dozed while she yelled for about 30 minutes. I couldn't wait to take a nap. I thought maybe we'd just watch movies all day. But we didn't. And when the afternoon rolled around and I wasn't sure I would be able to get a nap in, I just got pissed and decided to run on the treadmill and get frustration out. Henry was sleeping and Charlotte watched some Curios George. Then after about 25 minutes of treadmill and 40 minutes of Henry nap, he woke up. I convinced Charlotte to nap even though she put on her snow boots and wanted to run on the treadmill with me (I promised we'd do it after the nap). I went up to Henry. This is the part that always throws me. He nursed at 11:45. It was now 1:45. Not really long enough to nurse. So i tried to rock him back to sleep for about a half an hour. This is when I went crazy. I was really pissed. He just wouldn't let me put him down. But he slept in my arms. So I finally nursed him (hoping there wasn't lactic acid in my milk from the exercise). And he went down. But I didn't burp him. So he woke up 1 minutes later, then I had to burp him and rock him more. But he's been sleeping maybe 10-15 minutes now. I hear a little murmur every now and then and I don't know if anyone but a mother of a newborn understands how it makes the hackles rise. I just pray silently....please, please, please, please, stay asleep, please don't wake up! At least not until I want you to.

Charlotte's naps have gone from a solid 2 hours down to about 1 or 1 and a half. This sucks. Timing the two was hard enough before, now the window is smaller. But if I don't nap when they do, I still want some "me" time. The little vampires suck on me (one of them literally) all day long.

Sleeping at night is horrible. I can't get to sleep. I know I'm tired, I know I need to sleep but I lie there. At 9:30 or 10 when I first lay down. Then again whenever I get up to nurse. Seems like the only time I can really sleep is by morning when the stupid kids are getting up!

We're planning on joining the Y and I look forward to that,I think. They won't take Henry (or H-bomb as we affectionately call him now) until 3 months. In the mean time, maybe I'll try to get a workout at home in during his morning nap from 10:15-10:45. Maybe by exercising it will be easier to sleep. Maybe the endorphins will help me not want to kill myself. It didn't really work today, I wonder how long it takes.

Christmas miracles

2008-12-29T14:42:00.009-05:00

Wow, a long time since posting. I always think of things to say...just can't find the time to say them! But I might be finding more time soon. I might be dropping MY afternoon nap!

Henry is starting to stretch out his night sleeping! yeah! It started on Saturday after the VanderWier christmas party( Dec. 27). he nursed before we left at 10 pm and then not again until 9 the next morning! Since then I typically only get up once per night, at like 4 or 5 am, and then he wakes up about 9 am. He is settling into a predictable routine. He wakes up about 9, takes a 30 minute nap at about 10:15, nurses again at around noon, takes a nice nap about 1-3 (though he usually wakes about 35 minutes in and needs to be re-settled). Then we nurse again when he wakes up, maybe a 40 minute nap around 5:30, nurse again between 6 and 7, then bedtime between 8 and 9. It is so good to be able to count on it and plan things. The only problem is that going out of the house really screws with all of this. So while Dave has been home, no problem, but when I'm on my own and get lonely...we'll see.

Christmas was great, it is so fun with a toddler. Santa brought charlotte her dollhouse and dolls, which she loves. And then we went out to chinese for dinner with the Courvilles.

Henry is just doing his mid-afternoon nap wake up so I have to publish, but hopefully, I'll get more down soon.

Henry 5.0

2008-12-22T15:46:00.001-05:00

Things have really gotten so much better since my last post! Starting the evening before he turned 5 weeks old, Henry mysteriously stopped having the cramping screaming crying fits. He actually was laid down to sleep...and slept! He also started sleeping normal baby amounts during the day (every 1-2 hours after waking up, he'd nap) and he stopped doing marathon 5 hour awake stretches that ended in fits. This is all so good.

Now, don't get me wrong, he is still a baby and still cries and generally is fussy from 5-9 at night. Unfortunately, this is when Dave is home and Dave still refers to him as a "monster". But during the day, it is not so bad to deal with him!

We have had some times where "cry it out" seemed appropriate, and worked. Like, 5 minutes of crying followed by 2 hours of good sleep. And some times of course when that didn't work, the crying went on, the comforting went on, etc.

One surefire way to upset the apple cart is if I eat dairy. Everytime I have it, which isn't often, but I think that maybe it was just my imagination, is followed by about two days of a very fussy little guy!

And another change MIGHT be going on with him regarding night sleep. He usually would do a nice long stretch in the early night, like 8 or 9 pm to 2 am. Though I didn't get to bed/sleep until 10 or 10:30 so it was frustrating. Last night he nursed at 5 pm, then he was awake. and awake. and awake. I just couldn't get him to nap (though he seemed sleepy) so I tried to nurse him. NO WAY! he screamed and screamed. So, completely in tears and preparing for a horrible night, I put him in bed. I even went in at about 9:15 to try to trick him into nursing in his sleep. Didn't work.

He didn't wake up until 1 am! Which got me about 3 hours of sleep interruped by one potty break (darn). THen I thought he'd nurse every 2 hours from there...but he didn't wake up again until 6:30! Which got me 4.5 hours of sleep interrupted by one "oh my god, is he still breathing, let me check as long as I have to get up to pee" break. Today he has been very sleepy still. In fact, right now, I'm trying to decide if I should get him up babywise-style or just let him go til he meets his sleep needs. He proved that he can go awhile without nursing, let's just get it to the right time of day, or rather, night! So i'm going to get him at 3.5 hours between nursing just to harass him and try to nurse and maybe tonight will be better, and maybe I'll enjoy it more!!

Oh, incidentally, CJ is in daycare today so that is why I even have time to post and I took an 1.5 hour nap since Henry decided that the 6:30 feeding was the start of his day and I"d been up since 5:44 worrying he was dead. Early morning for mommy.

Big Changes

2008-11-22T15:30:00.002-05:00

Okay, reading the beginning of the last post, well, things have changed. In the time since then, Henry has gotten increasingly fussy. I have come to accept that he likely has colic. But that hopefully at 6 weeks (just after the peak of fussiness) he will get better. IF not, then maybe at 12 weeks. It is easier if I just think "two more weeks..."

I didn't think it was colic because he isn't always crying, but apparently colic is characterized by fussiness, not necessarily crying. And yes, it lasts on and off for three hours at a time. The worst is the mornings. At about 5 or 6 am he'll usually nurse, but then I can't seem to get him to lay back down. I'm up every thirty or forty minutes and pick him up and he burps or farts, or just calms down and then I put him down and it starts all over again. This goes on until about 8 or 9. And that is usually coinciding with Charlotte waking up. So I"m trying to soothe him or sometimes nurse him while she wants to get up, get juice and breakfast, sit in my lap, etcetera.

This morning I greeted my husband by yelling "I'm going to fucking kill someone if I don't get some god-damn sleep!". Lovely.

So PPD?? probably. But what to do about it?? Nothing. Just get through I guess. I'll have a better week maybe this week since Dave only works Mon-wed. THat helps. Just three days. Then as long as Thanksgiving goes okay...I'll get a few days with Dave. He's tired too. No one likes a screaming baby. And when it is paired with a screaming toddler...well, you just wanna kill someone. Most people with ppd want to hurt the baby. I mostly want to hurt Charlotte and this makes me feel terrible!

Let's give it two more weeks. Two more weeks. Two more weeks. Two more...

Random Thoughts...

2008-11-02T16:10:00.003-05:00

Wow, I have a few minutes, so we'll see what comes out. Lots of thoughts that I'd like to post, but not lots of time to post them!

Things are going well! Surprisingly, Henry seems to be just as good a sleeper as he is an eater. Maybe all the eating helps. He is nursing 2-3 hours apart during the day and the last couple of nights has done a few 4 hour stretches. Much different from CJ. She nursed about every 1-2 hours around the clock. I didn't even get a 3 hour break until she was two weeks and no 4 hour stretch until about christmastime.

Here is what I know about Henry. He is soooooo cute and I love his warm little head. I forgot how sweet a newborn can be. He hates diaper changes and cries violently, but it is getting better. I'm sure it has to do with the circumcision...ouch! He has to burp and poop ALOT during nursing, so I'm never quite sure when we're done. He'll pause to do both so even though he eats fast, it takes a while with all the little breaks he takes.

Charlotte just adores him and has plenty of confidence in holding him and pushing him on his swing. We try to tell her gentle (we say that about a million times a day to her) and she is pretty good, but she must be watched closely. She likes to help by putting blankets on him (scary) and insists when I'm nursing that it is "her turn!". She saw me nurse the first time and wanted to know what was happening. "henry eating?", she said. I said "can you say 'breastfeeding'?" and she said "Henry eating boob!" I guess that's all I can get from her right now.

We went to the mall and Lowes today as a family. Even with Dave I felt like managing the two was tough. just the logistics of the cart and the baby carrier. We took the new stroller for a test drive and CJ was okay with it at first, but it allows too much freedom if she isn't strapped in she'll jump right out.

Physically, I seem to be healing, though I'm dealing with hemorrhoids, which is new territory for me. But I put out some questions to my mothers and more group and find that I am not unique! So I am getting good advice. That is where the majority of my pain is coming from. I still can't believe I delivered naturally. Every time I lay down, I re-hash the whole thing in my head. I just can't believe how it all happened. So fast! I'm thankful for that and pretty darn scared about if I have another child! Dr. said I'd need to rent a Winnebago and live in the parking lot of the hospital the last month :-) Seriously.

Charlotte is napping, Henry is napping, and I just woke up from my nap so we are all doing great right now! Well, I think I'll use the rest of this free time to take care of house stuff.

Henry is born!

2008-10-27T15:53:00.003-04:00

Wow, in a feat of human ability, Henry managed to surprise the hell out of us this morning! We were, of course, getting set for my induction of labor that was to start at 9:30 pm on Monday night. I was upstairs in our bed and David has relegated himself the bed in the basement so as to get better sleep (he was overly concerned about every turn I made and was sleeping poorly). Here is the play by play:
5:04 I wake up and feel hungry, then like I have to poop. Go back to sleep.
5:11 wait a minute, this feeling like I have to poop feels like a contraction. 7 minutes apart. okay.
5:16 There it is again, I'll see if I have to pee.
5:17 water breaks just as I'm getting to the bathroom
5:20 call Dave's cell, "water broke, contracting, get upstairs please"
5:24 Call Dr. Murphy's office and give the details about water and contraction timing.
5:26 Dr. Murphy calls back, "go ahead and go to hospital, it'll probably be 4-6 hours"
5:40 Call Becky to see if she can get Charlotte. yep.
In the meantime, contractions are closer and closer together. I try to use my cell phone's stopwatch feature to time them. I get a little confused but see that contractions are 2 minutes apart. Dave is throwing stuff together. Bags are mostly packed. Can't find phone. I'm on the floor every couple of minutes grunting.
6:00 Becky arrives and takes Charlotte, I think. It gets hazy here. We get into car and drive to hospital. Take a wrong turn, bend the traffic rules slightly.
6:15 check into triage. I ask for my epidural for the first time.
6:17 The nurse checks my cervix (in between contractions). I am at 5 or 6. I ask for epidural. They have to give me an IV fist (in between contractions). I don't know how long and IV takes, but we started just after one contraction and I still had another while they were working. Those suckers were right on top of each other.
6:20 I ask for epidural again. I tell dave that I feel like I have to push. They start wheeling me to delivery. I tell nurses I feel like pushing and scream like a maniac, possibly frightening all other patients.
6:25 I ask for epidural. They examine me. I'm at an 8 or 9. They say, "call dr. murphy again".
6:30 The lady comes in to have me sign stuff for epidural. I don't care what the risks are!!
6:40 They check me and I'm complete. I give up on epidural and just say "drugs, drugs, drugs" all the while being a complete coward. They say, breathe in through nose and out through mouth. concentrate on breathing. Very difficult. Moaning felt better. Plus, I wasn't sure they realized how much pain I was in. Instead of asking for epidural I said I want a doctor!
6:42 Doctor comes in (dr. Hicks I beleive) and they drop the bottom half of bed, pull down the death star looking search light from the ceiling and put my legs up. I'm instructed to push with contractions. I mutter plenty about how I can't and don't want to and how it really hurts. I can feel baby in my vaginal canal and it feels pretty bad.
6:45 dr. says we need to do a small episiotomy since I tore last time. I guess they gave me a shot of lidocaine for that. I head the snipping but didn't care. I am pushing on contractions.
Doctor puts some sort of lube on and in a few more pushes (with lots of horrible screaming from me, and the medical staff insisting that I"m doing "great" (liars)
6:56 Henry is out! Thank God it doesn't hurt any more! Whoops, there goes placenta (that felt weird).

Henry is 9 lbs. 9 oz, 20 inches. Great skin tone, he might not be as olive as me, maybe closer to Dave's coloring. Dave thinks he looks like Charlotte. I think he just looks like baby :-)

I got sewed up (with a little more lidocaine). And got to order a fantastic breakfast with cinnamon french toast, then showered (gingerly) and was moved up to my room. I have my cell if you'd like to call :-)

I feel pretty good. Just on motrin for the cramping and "bottom pain" (along with the ice packs). Baby Henry is doing well, seems to latch on okay, not great, but hey, he's not even a day old! Charlotte has fared well today with Becky and is currently with daddy getting our car seat and they will be back to visit shortly. My friend Chrsiti even brought a balloon and a "I'm a big sister" pin. She also took the picture at the top.

People for birthday ring

2008-10-26T14:14:00.003-04:00

I didn't realize I hadn't put up pics of finished birthday ring people. Here they are:

Finishing up crafts...

2008-10-23T14:06:00.003-04:00

Two posts in one day! Crazy!
I finished the birthday ring with some decorative painting. And the birthday crown is also done. And i got a great craft idea to do with Charlotte form someone else's blog (outline leaves with black marker and have the little one "color" it and cut out and tape to window. And charlotte is cute. Here are pics to prove it.

Gigantotron

2008-10-23T08:51:00.002-04:00

Yep, that is what Dave calls me. Don't blame him. I move with all the grace of a robot. That is HUGE! Turns out there is a good reason (and a reason why I can't breathe well). Tuesday Doc did an ultrasound to find the baby was ONLY 9 lbs. He thought it was bigger, but as it turns out, I have a condition called polyhydramnia. This is too much amniotic fluid. Happens .5-2% of pregnancies. That doesn't sound too bad, right? Right, sort of.

Increases risk of other things like cord prolapse (BAD), baby not settling into pelvis properly (not good), chances of c-section :-(, and me bleeding out after the baby (also bad). He's mildly concerned about shoulder displaysia though I'm not as concerned. CJ was 8'10" so I figure I'm good with the biggies.

Talk of induction...going to do another non-stress test on Friday and have doc check my cervix to see if it is "favorable for induction". This would mean a combination of dilation, thickness, and baby station. Probably would induce by next Tuesday. So the end is in sight. But I"m a little freaked about these other risks. And the fact that this condition CAN be caused by problems with fetal development; my doctor feels that risk is low and that if that were the case we would have caught it sooner. But you all know that a tiny worry or risk to a mother turns into a giant scare pretty easily.

In the mean time, today is my day off with Charlotte and I plan to wrap up some errands, work on finishing touches of crafts and even hit the library to find a good book to take my mind off of all of this!!

no progress

2008-10-20T22:32:00.005-04:00

I saw the ob today. Looks like I"m still where I was last week. Which is sort of okay, since I'm not actually due for 5 more days. However, he's getting concerned about the "size of the baby" and is thinking about induction. He said he doesn't want to induce me yet, unless i progress or the baby is "too big". I asked what is too big and he said 9 or 10 lbs. I'm pretty sure that Henry is about that. To be sure, I have an ultrasound Tuesday at 10 am so we can look at size. This will be nice because it will feel like I"m doing SOMETHING. Instead of just waiting, which is hard!

I finished making the little people for Charlotte's birthday. They are cute.

We went to the Boo at the Zoo thing last Saturday. Charlotte is a bee this year.She even has a squishy little stinger in the back. I made the "dress" but bought the wings and headband. lazy mama!

Living large...

2008-10-18T08:27:00.006-04:00

I'm still hanging in there. My "personal" predicted due date (Oct. 17) has come and gone and Henry is cozy in there. I was a tad worried about movement but a quick call from good old Andy helped ease my mind..."you'll notice that the baby seems to move less because there is less room to really pull back and give a good kick and also the baby is sleeping more and more. If you are worried, have a small snack and lie down for 15-20 minutes. If there is no movement, call the doctor and you can come in for a non-stress test. Most likely, you are preoccupied and the movements are lower in intensity". So I feel better. There was lots of action last night. I mean that in more than one way. I've decided to try the old intercourse induction method, but it isn't pretty. It's worse than trying to conceive. Very little romance there.

Tonight we're headed to Muskegon to have a Laboween party with the Wiles and Jason and Uncle Jim will watch CJ. We might also get to pick up my plaster torso cast. The artist sent pics, but I'll wait til I get it tonight and take my own pics. It looks like it is very cool!

On Wednesday night it was raining and lately I've noticed what appears to be a shiny, mucas slug trail IN MY HOUSE by the side door. Now, I hate worms, but at least they are a gardener's friend. Slugs are friend to no one! THose things disgust me. So back to Wednesday night...as we enter the door I look down and sure enough a nasty old slug is sitting there munching on a stray bit of cat food!! Dave, of course, taught CJ that "slugs are cute" and the sound they make is "nee-nee-nee-nee-nee" with little fingers on head like antennae wiggling around. Here are pics of that.
CJ is fascinated with the buggers and now she goes to look for them and is so disappointed when they are not there.

Oh, I finished Charlotte's crown and birthday ring.

The dollhouse is coming along nicely, I repaired the crappy job on the roof and put in a couple of walls. Just thinking about painting/or not painting it.

I am making little "people" for Charlotte's birthday and they aren't something I'm proudest of, but my dear, sweet friend Tara was so kind and agreed to hunt for acorn caps for little hats for me. I just couldn't get myself to get all bent over hunting for anything on the ground right now. I think when I get the hair on and the caps, it'll make them look a little less homely. At least their faces turned out okay.

Progress

2008-10-14T22:16:00.002-04:00

Here is a cute pic of Charlotte wearing her "Chip Day" shirt. Looks so cute!!

I am getting by, trying to be patient about baby. Thinking every minute, this could be it...but each day passes. I hit the wall last weekend. I just feel done. I'm sick of knocking CJ down. Sometimes it is because I don't see her, sometimes because I think I'm walking straight, but my waddle is so pronounced I just bop her to one side or the other. I feel good when I'm sitting :-) Getting up at night is getting even tougher. It takes so long just to get out of bed! Dr. said that I'm about at 3 cm. Funny, after 5 hours of labor with CJ (and pitocin) I was still only at 1. But my cervix is still "back" (whatever that means) so I'm going to go anytime really soon. I'm setting my sights on Friday! In the meantime, I'm still working on my projects. An update: Since a wooden doll highchair costs $40-50 I decided to make one. So for UNDER $10, I made this.

I also am working on her dollhouse. Coming nicely. It will be hard to wait until christmas because I think she'll really like it. I have the clasp on the end and the hinges on. Just have to finish interior walls, do something about the roof, and I think I'll polyurethane it. I was going to paint it, but I like the unfinished wood look so much.

I am, of course, also working on her birthday ring. The people are done, I got candles, I just have to find a way to drill the holes for the candles and people so it all fits well. Then maybe poly or paint the ring.
her crown is done. Might send pic of that later. Right now I'm also working on putting together a birthday book. Like a scrapbook, but oh so much easier using online ordering and pics we have from the last year. It is so hard, I love every picture of her!!

Nesting = Crafting?

2008-10-06T22:02:00.007-04:00

Lately I have been seriously into crafting. I suspect that since housework sucks and it is hard to move around alot, I'm really just nesting in another way.
While everyone in my family was at Chip's wedding, I was at a pottery studio painting him a platter for a gift. I also did one for Dave's cousin whose wedding we're missing
because it is Oct. 25.(don't forget, click on pic to make it bigger)

I am making Charlotte a dollhouse for Christmas and it is coming along nicely. I used the router to cut out window holes and then I used the dremel to smooth it out a bit. Still needs lots of work, though.

I am making a German birthday ring for Charlotte's birthday. This is a ring with 12 little people on it and each birthday you replace a person with a candle. Here is the start of some of the people. I won't post a link to what I saw and am copying, mine doesn't look as good!

I am also making her a birthday crown that she can wear each year (hopefully). I saw these on another blogger's page and thought they were adorable. Some charge like $40 for them. I think it cost about $6 for this one.

We are enjoying fall and I put CJ into a cute Halloween outfit.

We went to the dr. office today. After I get on the table and the nurse finds the baby's heartbeat, Charlotte likes to get up onto the table and lift up her shirt, too. Monkey see, monkey do!
The doctor checked my cervix and said that I'm internally at 3 and externally at 1. Totally normal for a second pregnancy. I felt relieved that there were no signs of imminent labor. I thought I was having contractions last weekend and that really threw me. What about all my unfinished crafts? Better get them done!

I just love her!

2008-09-24T14:12:00.003-04:00

Just felt the need to express how much I admore my darling little angel, Charlotte. I had no idea I could love anyone this much (sorry Dave, it is just different). She is, at the age of almost 2, sometimes exasperating but sometimes so adorable I just want to get a spoon and eat her up! She is currently in her crib shouting "big sister!" She really likes the "I'm a big sister" book her Oma got her and I let her take it bed with her today. I might have to go in and remove it. I don't know if she'll nap with all that excitement!

I feel sort of bad that when Henry comes, her little world will fall apart in a way. No more of all the attention being just on her! But it will be a special time for her and Daddy and a chance to develop a special relationship with Henry. That will hopefully last. And I know that in a few years, they will play together and I'll be so glad they have each other.

In the meantime, I want to just appreciate all I can about THIS moment. The feeling of Henry kicking and rolling like a rock-n-roll star inside me. THe joy of her smile when I get her each morning. Watching how much she and her daddy love each other and make each other giggle. Cuddling up just the two of us (and a giant belly) to read stories. Her calling the cat "stupid dumb-dumb" (wonder where she got that?) and ordering him around, though he rarely follows her orders. And now that she sometimes call us "kate" and "Dave" I even love that!

But for now, I'm off to relax, we had a tiring day at the zoo and my feet are swollen a bit and my back is tired. So I'll lie down and get back to reading my book about why TV and Videogames are so horrible for children. I need encouragement to keep me from plopping her in front of the tv when I'M tired.

Charlotte Dancing

2008-09-21T16:04:00.003-04:00

This video was taken August 30, so it is a little old. She had recently discovered the joys of jumping. Enjoy.

An amazing experience!

2008-09-16T15:55:00.013-04:00

When I was pregnant for Charlotte, I ordered a belly casting kit from the internet. It was only about $20 and included plaster and strips to make a cast for your big belly. Then you can paint it or whatever.

But it never came, at least, not before Charlotte did!

So this time, I wanted to make sure I got it done. I thought maybe I'd just do it myself and asked my brother, an artist, where to get plaster. He talked to his good friend John and found out that there are some hazards to trying to do this yourself, the plaster heats up, people can pass out, you can get chemical burns. Ugh. Maybe I'll just order the kit.

But I talked with John and he SO graciously offered to do it for me at half cost. this is really great, because it isn't cheap. Without the "family discount" it would run at least $250 for this. The plaster alone is about $60 and it takes hours of work, sanding, finishing, etc. He was kind enough to give us half off. But this is way better than those internet kits and totally worth it!!

So today I went to John's studio in Muskegon and Grandma watched Charlotte. John has been doing plaster casting for about 30 years and he showed me some samples of his work:
He also showed me some from a pregnant model:

But I liked the ones that were more of a profile:

So I decided to try that. The way it works is pretty simple. Get naked (don't worry, I have no modesty) and cover yourself liberally with petroleum jelly. This keeps your skin and hair from sticking in the plaster. Make sure the pubic area is slicked, you don't want this to become a brazillian. Then he fills the tub with plaster. There are cinder blocks around the edge and there are towels on them:

Then plaster is poured in and you lay in it. I'll spare you the picture of what I looked like after lying it (it is, of course, nude) and just show you what the cast looks like:
This is the negative.
Here are some closer up pictures of it.
John waits for it dry, then pours more plaster in it to create a positive. Then he sands and finishes it. You can paint it or cover it in rice paper for a translucent shell. you can hand it on a wall or put a post into it for a free standing thing. I have no idea what we'll do, but I'm so glad I did it! What an experience and now the beauty of pregnancy is captured, for me, at least!

For my Boo-boo

2008-09-11T21:32:00.005-04:00

Charlotte helps wash my car. She is great at the details!

I was thinking about how my blogging has fallen off and I realized that I needed to do it again. Mostly this is for Charlotte. Since I don't make scrapbooks or save stuff or do anything like that, this is the best "baby book" that Charlotte can hope for from me. I also went back and re-read posts of Charlotte pregnancy and it was really nice.

So there is alot to update and I won't even attempt to fill in everything. I'll say that Charlotte and Dave and I had a great summer. It was pretty packed. Somehow we found a way to be busy everyday. We had our weekly playgroup, we crashed other playgroups, we had park dates, we went to Frederick Meijer Garden, we went to swim lessons, and we just played in the yard and with the pool and sandbox. It has been tons of fun.

I have watched Charlotte just explode in communications!After our vacation with the Courvilles and DiGennaros she picked up tons of words. She cracks me up, the things she says now. I pointed to Dave and asked what we call him and she said "Daddy" and then I said what if we need something, then what do we say? She screamed "Dave!". It made Dave and I just roll with laughter. I hadn't even coached her to say it, she just did.

We made some attempts at potty training, but I don't think we're quite ready. She shows lots of signs. She tells me after she goes, she wants to be changed, she gets the diapers, she goes to the changing table, she is fascinated with watching others go, she loves to sit on her potty, and she takes off and puts on pants. What she does not do is tell me BEFORE she has to go. So we pretty much peed and pooped all over the house for a few days. Which wasn't too much of an issue, it was mostly on the wood floor. And some in the yard, which is no problem.

Mostly I just found it difficult when I'd catch her mid-pee and try to haul a thirty pound urinating child into the bathroom with my big old belly and waddle trying to move quickly and not succeeding! This pregnancy is WAY harder while chasing Charlotte. I had no idea how easy it was to be pregnant and "work". Now this, what I do with CJ all day, is real work. Bending, lifting, holding, chasing, etc. Plus my lap is steadily disappearing. She has to sit on my knee and she still tries to wiggle back into my lap and that puts alot of pressure on my belly. Which already has plenty of pressure!

I'm basically the same weight and shape as I was when I gave birth to Charlotte. And i still have 6-8 weeks?! We'll see. Dr. Murphy said that I would be more likely to go early again since I had Charlotte early, but there is no guarantee. I keep talking to women who had their first child three weeks early, then the next was two weeks late!

I think I lost my mucas plug a couple of weeks ago, but that doesn't mean anything. In fact, I might be dilated right now, but again, that doesn't mean anything. I am carrying much lower, of course. If I have another, it'll be waving out under my skirt!

I'm tired and my back is really sore about two hours after I get up. I wake up and feel good, but I'll go grocery shopping and just be beat. But I don't have that crazy pelvic pain that I had with CJ. Oh, Henry is head down which is good. Unless he gets all nutty and turns that means hopefully we'll be able to avoid a C-section. But peeing is really a problem. He must be just pressed right against my ureter because I can't pee more than a tiny trickle at a time. Very unsatisfying.

Update

2008-04-18T20:44:00.002-04:00

I'm 13 weeks now, due Oct. 25. This baby and CJ will be nearly exactly 2 years apart. I'm feeling better, sort of. No more puking :-) but lots of just plain feeling crappy every evening and some mornings. I'm definitely starting to show, but I can still wear regular clothes.

Charlotte is awesome! She is so fun and we really like the beautiful weather we've been having. We go outside and swing, take wagon rides, drive in her pink car, and just walk around. I have plenty of yard work to do, but she doesn't like doing that as much.

I nap pretty much every day while Charlotte does and I wonder if it will ever end. Will I be tired for the next 18 years?? Very possible. I am busy with Mothers and More and am proud of the work I do though I sometimes get overwhelmed.

I'm reading A New Earth, the book Oprah is doing a special webcast class for. I like it and find it inspiring when times are tough. I'm enjoying a nicely rekindled relationship with my siblings but miss my dad.

I participated in the making of a prenatal bellydance DVD and am interested to see the final result which I will share when it is done. I did it in exchange for class credits at Laura's studio. But right now I find bellydancing just exhausting. I haven't done so much as walk around much for the last 10 weeks or so.

So I'll leave you with a video of Charlotte from her Easter Egg Hunt.

Finally- a sign of life!

2008-03-28T21:07:00.003-04:00

You may have wondered what happened to me. Looks like my last post was on Feb.10 and on the 12th I got great news! This is how we told my mom:

But the thing is, I've been feeling terrible. Not as bad as some women, but worse than with Charlotte. It is amazing how used to throwing up you can get. You just have to move on. But I thought I'd post a pic of Charlotte in her beautiful special dress from Uncle Andy (Godfather):

Charlotte and the beans

2008-02-10T21:48:00.000-05:00

A suggested activity for kids is to put beans on the floor on a sheet and let them explore the texture. Yep. Makes a big mess, but she seemed to like it.

my favorite pic of charlotte right now

2008-02-05T14:47:00.000-05:00

By the way, she's holding a bottle of Basalmic vinegar.

fresh pics of cutie pie

2008-01-27T22:18:00.001-05:00

Back to normal

2008-01-26T21:35:00.000-05:00

Good news! After physical therapy last Friday and Saturday, I felt slightly better.So on Sunday I went to bellydance class. On the advice of my teacher, Laura, I didn't do the shimmies and hip motions and she showed me some stretches. This helped a little more. But by Thursday even though I generally felt better, it just didn't feel right. So I was fortunate to have my dear Andy call for a lunch date and he took a look at it. Turns out he could SEE that my hips were crooked. He did some wacky wonderful DO stuff that thankfully no one walked in on since I was pretty much laying on the floor with my pants unzipped and his hands on my pubis. But the good news is that it was corrected. It felt sore pretty much until today (Saturday) but I actually would say that I feel "good". Yippee.

Also, I'm thinking about dancing again if Laura will have me. It is exciting and I am definitely motivated to lose some weight! But who knows, maybe I'll be pregnant soon :-)

Health and Happiness

2008-01-22T13:30:00.000-05:00

Yet again I find myself regretful of not posting more. Perhaps I'll challenge myself to a weekly post at least. You can complain to me if I fail to comply!

Starting January 7 I have had health issue after health issue. I won't be taking it for granted any time soon. On the Jan. 7 I had a minor surgery to reveal the titanium post put in for my "super tooth". I just had a shot (during which the dr. asked for Nitrous so that he could finish because I was so panicky) and ended up with a mere two stitches. But it was tender for a while and I self medicated with some booze and old vicodin pills. By January 9 I was okay again.

Until about dinnertime, when I made a yummy meal of quesedillas and found I had no interest in eating. Not typical! As the evening progressed, I noted a huge headache and a sore throat. I thought the headache was due to the fact that I had been crying all afternoon because I called the vet and we have decided to put Calvin down. But Thursday morning was terrible. I laid lethargically on the couch until noon when I made Dave come home to help take care of Charlotte. He stayed home the next day also while I ran to the doctors. I was pretty sure I had the flu (fever, chills, sore throat, bad head,etc.), but they said no.

I was also seeing the doctor about the fact that I couldn't open my right eye. Yep, pink eye. Oh and Charlotte had it too. Giving eye drops to a one year old take two people!

So I was basically a useless vessel of snot and fatigue Saturday and Sunday. The afternoon of Sunday I felt better and went to belly dancing (Oh, I started that again:-) and after that I felt much better! Monday and Tuesday were okay, I was still a little tired, sore throat, cough, etc.

Wednesday (the 16th) I managed to throw out my back in what I suspected was the same thing that happened when I was pregnant. Unfortunately, when I did my exercises to fix it, even though I heard a small pop, it was still pretty bad on Thursday. So I tried to see the physical therapist, but he needed a referral. So I called my ob. But wait, the insurance needs the referral from Primary Care Physician. Called him. On vacation. My back is in the meantime pretty darn painful. Crying and such. So I see some other guy at the office and pay $20 for him to say, yep, you should get physical therapy. But they couldn't get me in that day, so I got some more vicodin which didn't kill the pain, but made me less concerned about it in general.

Friday I went to physical therapy and my back was worse when I left. Oh, also $20 for this. Then I went again on Saturday and it was better. He massaged it for about 30 minutes and we changed my exercises. Still not entirely sure what the problem is, but there is another $20. On sunday I felt a little better and didn't want to miss what we were learning of the belly dance routine, so I went to that. Fortunately, Laura (my teacher) is a thai massage person and is very knowledgeable of this stuff. She gave me some exercises to try and did some pushing on my butt (the pain is in my sacrum, quite low down).

I feel better today (Tuesday), finally. I took it easy yesterday (as much as you can while caring for a one year old that must be put into and taken out of car seats, high chairs, and cribs). I also applied some heat. As Laura said, it isn't so much the bones as the muscles that are too tense and bunched to let the rest go into place. SO lots of sacrum opening exercises that I shall continue to do. I have a physical therapy appt. for tomorrow that I plan on cancelling. I can't pay another $20 for a maybe feeling better, maybe worse situation. I am still slightly sore, but I can manage household duties much better and even danced with Charlotte a little today (just try not to dance when "Hey Ya" comes on the radio followed by U2's "Elevation" which I'm just having a lovefest for anyway. Oh, and Gettin' Jiggy Wid It, also was on. Yep, that is the spelling. A sad thing, I know.

Incidentally, the physical discomfort and inability put a certain strain on my marraige that was not welcome. I'll discuss that more another time. I've got to take advantage of nap time to make my egg salad and do the rest of my job as an at-home mom.

New hair

2007-11-27T20:47:00.000-05:00

I have always wanted to something interesting/dramatic with my hair. But as a teacher, I never felt free to really do that. So now I am not teaching, pregnant, or nursing. So I went ahead and did it. I really do like it- it was just what I wanted. Just more $$ than I wanted.

Happy at Home

2007-10-31T15:17:00.000-04:00

Wow! Over a month since last post, pretty pathetic. And the last thing that got me to post was $100. Alas, I have found no more money. Just having thoughts about every day things I'd like to post about and never having the time. Never making the time. It is something you need to commit to, right Roland?

Anyway, little charlotte is doing just great. She is thinking hard about walking. We actually got a short video of her taking I think 15 steps. She hasn't done anything close to that since then. She is up and around all the time. We are weaning and that is a huge emotional thing for me. I didn't realize how hard it would be for me. She hardly seems to notice. We dropped the noon nursing on Monday and then the 4:00 starting Tuesday. I figured I would just see how she took it. It was extra hard since at first she wouldn't take any cows milk to replace it. so I worried that she'd starve. The funny thing is that I'm really not making much milk, so nursing her was causing her to starve more than anything else! She started getting up more than her usual once per night. She was getting up two or three times at night and I'd nurse her because it was just easier than anything else. But I might have done her a disservice. My husband was actually correct that she should be sleeping through the night and that we need to let her "cry it out" a little. Just a little, still go to her and make sure she is okay. It took a couple of days for me to be okay with this. The last two nights we have employed this and it hasn't been too bad. Since I've plyed her with food all day she didn't wake up until 4 or 5 am. Not bad. Before that she woke up as early as 11:30!!

We have lots of good days and some bad ones. Last week for the first time I actually wished I had a job. just to relieve the monotony. We try to go to playgroups and I'm exploring the play areas at the malls. I'm doing alot with Mothers and More. I am now a co-leader. At first it was stressful, but now it isn't too bad. The hard things, as usual, is being tactful with women. My logical side is overdeveloped and sometimes I just don't know how to approach something that might hurt someone else's feelings, especially when I think it shouldn't hurt her feelings.it is good for me.

I'm thinking of a new "project". I'd like to make Charlotte a play kitchen. Originally I wanted to make it for her second Christmas, but I think I just might be able to do it this year! IT costs about $200-$400 for a nice one and I think I could make one just fine. Plus it is fun to have my little projects.

Though it is getting tough to do things. Charlotte naps about 45 minutes a day. Which is really a nice amount of time to check my email, have a snack, relax, get out stuff to get something done (vacuum, dust, paint, etc.) and then she wakes up! That is okay, I love her!

I'm getting myself ready to think about another one. Exciting. So much love in kids, I can't believe it. But it is difficult too. Those tough days, they are really really tough. And what it does to your marraige, makes it stronger in some ways, but so hard to remember to put your partner first. Especially when taking care of that baby who needs you so much. But since I"m just down to nursing her twice a day and going to stop completely soon (sniff!) I can't believe I'll have my body back to just me! I haven't had that since February of 2006. I might need a month or two just to enjoy that before we get serious about trying.

But I'm happy being home and I LOVE being a mom to Charlotte. Her first birthday is next Monday and I'm so excited. i got her a baby doll and I just know she'll love her so much.

A Hundred Bucks

2007-09-16T21:13:00.001-04:00

This morning was one of those where we just had it with our set up. This can happen in any room of the house, though the kitchen is a nice target since it seems to be full of stuff we don't use. Today it was the silverware drawer. I guess we had about 42 spoons and forks for Charlotte and we hardly use them. There were straws, keys, random instruction sheets, cheese cutter, and a host of other things. So we cleaned it out. In the back I found a dollar! Wait, no there is a 0, it is a ten! Um, no, there are two 0's...a one hundred dollar bill!

What the hell is that doing there? Did I put it there? Did I do it on purpose? Why would I put so much money in the back of the drawer underneath junk I never use?? Well, cool anyway. Just think how much I could make if we cleaned the whole kitchen!

Nipple Nipping

2007-09-12T20:47:00.000-04:00

Last night at the before bed nursing, Charlotte gave my nipple a chomp! It really surprised me. I thought maybe she was impatient with that side and so I switched sides. On the other side, she gave an even harder Chomp! This made me grimace and then that hurt my face and made me cry. So I called Jen and asked what I'm supposed to do and I guess just saying "no" in a very firm voice and then stopping nursing if it continues. So I tried once more and she looked up at me, and very deliberately and slowly...Chomped! So I took her off and put her to bed. I felt so odd, I always thought the before bed nursing was important to her and I figured then I'd be up in a couple of hours to nurse her since she'll obviously be hungry. But she slept until 7 this morning!

So then when she woke up I was so nervous I was afraid she'd bite me more. But it went okay. When I nursed her next, she did give me a little chomp so I said "no" again and put her down. She cried and crawled around after me for 10 or 15 minutes than I put her back to breast and everything was fine. No biting tonight, so I'm starting to relax.

But if this biting thing continues...I just don't know. Holy cow, did it hurt! I don't know how much of that I could tolerate. And she only has two bottom teeth! I just so wanted to make it at least a year so I could avoid formula. I guess if I have to go to that it isn't too bad, but I've made it so far. And good for me! Instead of people saying (so pointedly) "you're STILL nursing??!", I'd like to hear a "good for you"! Because, well, it is hard and a big sacrifice. And I'm so glad I did it.

Oh, here is a cute pic of the baby doll, she was mimicking me and pursing her lips in a kissy face:

And just looking cute:
And having a glass of wine before dinner:

Better, Stronger, Faster?

2007-09-10T12:44:00.000-04:00

Today I had surgery to put in the titanium implant for tooth #7, aka the bane of my dental life. The good news is that I was totally under IV anesthesia so although I was panicky and scared, I don't actually remember much of it. I am home today on Vicodin. Napping alot and just hanging out. Charlotte, is of course, at day care. It is crazy that I thought I'd clean the toilets, do some sewing, do dishes, etc. and really I am in some pain and woozy from the drugs and I just need to chill.

We had a very nice weekend. Charlotte, Dave, and I went to BW3 for dinner Friday night and this is always fun. We did find out though that we might be getting to the point where out to eat with the baby is not really worth it. She is so much more mobile. She can sit in her high chair and eat with us, but she doenn't have the patience to just hang out. She wants to move around and crawl and stand and explore, God bless her. So we'll be going out to eat less which is probably best.

Then on Saturday, team Baker went to Muskegon and first stopped at my brother Chip's house where Daddy brewed late into the night. Then Mommy and Charlotte went to Grandma Stewart's and spent the night. Then at about noon we went out sailing with Uncle Chip and his new Lady Friend Colleen (who is very nice and passed the test... although anyone that I can chat with can pass the test!). Unfortunately, Daddy got pretty seasick. Oh, Charlotte stayed with grandma, too, so it was relaxing for mommy.

I notice I've now taken on the voice of Charlotte, so maybe it is time for me to stop.

Baby Pockets

2007-08-30T21:29:00.001-04:00

I am officially selling my Baby Pockets for $20 (price might go up for art fairs). Here are some sample patterns for them and a pic of what it looks like to wear one. My baby is 10 months and the Mary's son, Luke, is 18 months, so I think they're good up to about 24 months!

Baby Sling

2007-08-26T10:54:00.000-04:00

I'm thinking about selling those baby slings I made. I think I could start with $20. I don't think I'd use the internet, maybe art fairs? Here is a pic showing how I could carry Charlotte and move a table on vacation. And there is Mary and I at the winery, we both wore the slings while wine-tasting. It is a hands-free device!

New Haircut

2007-08-08T21:14:00.000-04:00

I got my hair chopped off! I think it looks great and the pictures don't to it justice. Plus, my husband assures me that this cut is "all the rage in hollywood". Very short in back, longer in front. It is new and I like it.

Also, charlotte is getting enough hair to have bedhead. So cute. OH, and she's crawling like crazy.

Charlotte on the move!

2007-08-03T21:02:00.001-04:00

Charlotte is crawling as of last week, starting about the 23 or 24 of July. Well, mostly a crawl. She usually has her right leg pretty straight and walks with that one and uses her left knee to crawl on the other side. She is also really big about standing and walking with help.

Oh, and her tongue is usually out since she if feeling where her NEW TEETH are coming in! Bottom right side is through, working on left side.

She had her first trip to the beach on the 21st of July.

Here is a the cite with pics of that and Nita's visit ( copy and paste into browser, then click on the photo album on the left): http://www.kodakgallery.com/AlbumMenu.jsp?&view=1&page=&sort_order=&albumsperpage=&ownerid=79079749111&navfolderid=2007

New Hutch

2007-08-03T20:48:00.000-04:00

The other day as I was driving home I saw a sign for an estate sale. I was interested in getting a hutch or something to keep the pretty things grandma has given us. I found one and I thought it was old at first, but it isn't. But I still think I paid an okay price at $100. Not a great deal by any means, but a fair price and I think for the same money I couldn't get anything half as nice brand new.

I also got some dessert plates and teacups. I thought I paid an okay price on these, but mostly I think they are cute and I intend to use them. I paid $24 for the set of 8. I saw on the internet that a set of 8 coffee cups go for $85. So maybe that makes up for the hutch.

Sew Happy

2007-08-03T20:20:00.000-04:00

First update: Charlotte has an ear infection. Not a surprise. I had an appt. for tomorrow, but Mary suggested I get in today. She was sounding pretty sure it was an ear infection and it is easy to tell (look in the ears). So yep, Charlotte is on some antibiotic plus a "cocktail" of tylenol and benedryl. At least she'll sleep a little better until the antibiotic kicks in. So in addition to the super cranky little darling who won't nurse, I had to go get prescriptions, and then the damn pharmacy didn't have it, so then I had to go back after chasing around all damn day. And dave is gone on some wonderful sailing trip with my brother. I'm thinking he owes me for this one for sure.

Back to the title of the post, I've been sewing a whole bunch (thanks again to Susan, my personal sewing tutor). I saw a "baby sling" at Baby Beloved last week and figured I could make it. Plus, I heard that Target is carrying some that are like $50. So i went to the fabric store and made one. It is pretty great. I already made five more! Then I gave one as a gift at a baby shower and a friend asked me to make three more for her! She'd pay, of course. I'm a little nervous because I'm pretty sure they are safe..I mean, I use mine with Charlotte all the time...I use a triple straight stitch across the main seam and then I finish the seam. What do you think, Susan? I didn't get a pic of the one I already gave away. I also tried to put a little detail on the edges and sewed on little "homemade" tags. You can click a pic to see closer up.

Sick Baby Doll

2007-08-03T12:28:00.000-04:00

So much to say. I'll probably blog several times in the next few days. Charlotte is sick. She had a slight fever on Saturday and Sunday and a runny nose. Probably teething, I thought. Also some diarrhea (also a teething symptom). But then her temp went way up.Monday and Tuesday were miserable. She only wanted to be held. Trouble sleeping at night. I nursed her like every hour and a half. But it made her happier. She didn't eat any solid food, so her stools were runny anyway. I took her to the doctor on Tuesday and he said that it was likely a summer virus that is pretty typical and has all those symptoms. She broker her fever on Wednesday evening and was much happier. Smiling and playing. She claps now, it is so cute. Thursday she was okay, not her usual self entirely, but much better, walking around, etc. Then last night was horrible again. She wouldn't sleep unless I held her and she isn't nursing well. So I usually nurse her when she is upset and that always works. But when she won't nurse...oh, it is awful! I don't know what non-nursing moms do, seriously! Nursing may be best for baby, but I'm sure it is even better for moms.
Another doctor appt. today at 4:30. We'll see...I'm pretty sure it is an ear infection. Some antibiotics and hopefully all will be well again soon.

Fun in the sun!

2007-07-17T21:07:00.000-04:00

Haven't posted in a long time (as reminded by a friend). Just having too much fun with my girl. We went out on Chip's boat for Father's day. Charlotte was pretty good, but hated the infant life vest. When we took it off her, she sat in the sun on the deck and played very well. She'd going great; sitting up well and can walk with help from us. She is thinking about crawling, but not quite there. She pushes up on hands but can't get knees under her. She takes baths in the kitchen sink and tries to suck on the faucet. We went to friends's houses and have been in pools. Charlotte loves the water. She is getting tan despite our best efforts to keep her safe from the sun. There is a picture of her in the pool with her tan little feet against Jackson's pearly white skin. I also have some videos I can post later.

Some Charlotte

2007-06-05T20:35:00.000-04:00

and check out the pics on her web page!
http://web.mac.com/bake3310/iWeb/Charlotte%20Jane/6%20month%20pictures.html

The flipper: 3-6 more months

2007-05-11T18:26:00.000-04:00

On Monday of this week I had my oral surgery. Thankfully, Dave was able to be home so that he could drive me. As the doctor spoke with me about the procedure I began to cry a little and so he gave me IV drugs to make me knocked out (free of charge, even). Afterward I was given Vicodin and motrin and sent on my way with my false tooth in place on the flipper. That is the retainer thing I have to wear.

It was an awful week last week. I was in alot of pain and pretty much detest the flipper. I went to the dentist to see about the flipper but he said it fit fine, it was "referred pain" that made it feel uncomfortable. Then I went back to the surgeon because I lost one of my two stitches Monday night and then the collagen plug came out and it is a big hole. Then it wouldn't stop bleeding and I got a blood clot which had to be plucked out (eeew). Then it bled alot more, another clot, more bleeding, etc.

But now it is okay. I'm off pain meds though I have to leave the flipper in to eat and that is tough. I also can't really bite off anything. Lots of cutting stuff up tiny.

Also, the implant was not implanted since the doctor found infection, he had to inject bone grafting materials. So in AUGUST I might get the implant (providing the healing is going well) and then a couple of months after that, the abutement and crown. A long road for tooth #7.

Dental Drama

2007-04-30T18:09:00.000-04:00

Okay, i called the dentist first thing this morning and they got me in at 11:20 (I got someone to cover my classes and go back at 12:30, pumped, at lunch, and was teaching at 1:00). The bad news: my tooth is totally screwed up. This tooth, by the way, started plaguing me at age 10! The baby tooth was pulled. The adult tooth wouldn't descend which screwed up alignment in all my teeth. Surgery in 7th grade to scrape off the gum and glue on a bracket for braces. Four years later, the braces come off. 7 years later there is badness and needs a root canal. Then there is a cyst (size of a skittle) to be removed with surgery. Then there is another root canal for some reason. Then Dave says "Hey, why do you have a dark tooth" and I found out it had "died". So it was ground down to a nubbin and a crown was put on. Two years later, a co-worker says, "hey, that crown looks shabby, you should have it re-done" to which the dentist said, yes, it isn't our best work, we'll re-do it for free. new crown. Falls off two years ago. Reglued and replaced since it broke off the stump that held it into the root-canaled empty root. Now it is loose. x-rays later this morning it is revealed that the remaining root (which isn't much) is cracked in half on both sides. what I need: Extraction (pulling it out, don't ask me how or what they'll pull on). Then a titanium root is inserted. Then I get a retainer with a fake tooth on it because there will be a big whole. This will last three to six months. Then they'll put on a new crown. Oh, and after insurance pays the measly $600 or so it covers, I'll owe about $3,000. Nice. oh, and I'm out of sick days so I'll need Jen to take Charlotte to her sixth month appointment on the 16th of May (I'll meet up with her briefly to nurse if someone covers my classes) so that I can take the next day off to start the horrors.

Did I mention that this is a front tooth?

Dave has renamed it "super tooth", which made me laugh (and cry).

Thank you to everyone who sent nice comments about my plight. Just one day at a time, I guess. I suppose this has reaffirmed my faith in god because all I can do is pray for strength right now (remember the old "footsteps" story?).

The end of my rope

2007-04-27T21:05:00.000-04:00

1. I have a 6 month old baby.
2. I breastfeed, so I am the baby's only source of food.
3. I get up at 5:oo am to nurse the baby pretty much every day.
4. I get up at least once at night to put the cat outside because he is making too much noise begging for attention by banging on walls and doors.
5. I get up for work at 5:55.
6. I work full time.
7. As a middle school teacher.
8. I have a crown on my front tooth that is loose and about to fall off and I have to wait 4 days for a dentist appointment and I don't even know what I'll do with the baby then.
9. The cat is now peeing on things (twice in front of me) because he wants more attention
10. My husband is out of town and has been steadily since March 21.
11. He will be out of town until the end of May.

I am a single mom working full time with a pain in the ass cat and a broken tooth. I don't know how much longer I can take this. Note the lack of cute smilies after that statement. I'm not laughing. I'm not smiling. I'm pretty much doing alot of crying.

Ahhhh....spring!

2007-04-25T13:08:00.000-04:00

Also, Ahhhhh...a day off! I took a personal day today to just have some Katie time. Jen was kind enough to pick up Charlotte and bring her to daycare so that I could go back to sleep. I slept until 10:30. I have so far mostly laid around. Considering that this has not happened for about 6 months, I think I deserve it. Also, Dave will be gone for the next two week, weekend included, so there are no breaks there. I've enlisted the help of kind friend Jen to give her a bottle a couple of times this weekend. This is because I'm participating in a breast pump study (I get $100) and I have to pump twice a day, even on weekends so someone has to give Charlotte a bottle.

The last week or so I"ve been agonizing about the whole work situation. The question has been: Work part time or no time? Many say that if you CAN do stay at home, to take it! But there are other considerations. The plusses of working part time? Well, I contribute toward years of service and my retirement. I get non-baby/adult time (this is reduced slightly since I mostly see 7th graders). I get extra $$, which is nice and can help us to buy a house in a better school district for Charlotte. Also, I am guaranteed a job year to year instead of having to start all over in the job hunt, and I love my co-workers!

But I'm leaning more toward just being at home. IT is hard to make a decision now since Charlotte is waking up at night and Dave is gone ALOT...so it is really crappy right now. But even with part time I'd likely be at school from 7:30 until noon. And right now my job satisfaction is pretty low. I'm struggling with some of these kids and they are so ungrateful and I"m stressed. Of course, again, I'm doing full time now and teaching three different classes (including science, which is notoriously harder to prep for)...If I went part time I"d just be doing one prep.

Wow, when I started typing, I was 90% sure to stay at home. But now it doesn't seem so bad. Of course, now I'm sitting at home on a day off with no kid and no work. Everything seems easy now. I think Charlotte does need me at home and that I am the best care for her. And if I"m pregnant again next spring, working would suck.

Anyway, the purpose of the post was going to be to about last weekend and how nice it was. We got outside and Charlotte spent some time in her little tent, with her sunglasses on, and in her adirondack chair (got at a garage sale for $1.00 which explains the sticker on her). Remember, you can click on a pic to "enbiggen" as Susan says.

We also gave her her first rice cereal, here is a movie of it.

Easter

2007-04-15T17:10:00.000-04:00

Easter was a good time
with the Mothers and More easter egg hunt. Charlotte didn't hunt so much, but mom and dad had a good time socializing. Then on Sunday we went to my mom's.

Well, Charlotte and I have had our first colds together. I took her to the doctor on Friday and she got an anti-biotic for a sinus infection. I'm just toughing it out....for now. She is managing it pretty well. I suck the snot out as much as I can. She has a little trouble nursing since she's so congested. She nurses a bit then pulls away and gasps! then goes back to it.

Spring break was great. The nicest part was finding out the good news that Dave is getting a raise/promotion and will at some point actually be transferred to development. The bad news is that we don't know when. The "schedule" has Dave in Ohio until the end of May. This is pretty tough...I don't know if I can do it. Charlotte is wonderful, but it really sucks to be alone. He's already been gone four weeks and a weekend. But he'll be home next weekend (whoa, two in a row) so that is nice :-)

We just took Charlotte on a walk and she had her sunglasses on. So cute. She looked like an extreme snowboarding baby in her snowsuit and sunglasses.

Today we did laundry. Charlotte helped.

I'm pretty sure I won't be working full time next year. I meet with my principal on Monday to discuss part time options tomorrow. I don't think he'll have all that much to say...it's isn't all in his power. Making through the rest of the year will be pretty hard. I just want to be with Charlotte, and Dave. But it is mid-April already and only two months to go. I'll leave you with a video of Charlotte. She is watching daddy eat pizza...I think she might be ready for food.

Charlotte and Kiera at Ikea

2007-04-04T21:10:00.000-04:00

What good friends!

Spring Break!

2007-04-01T18:11:00.000-04:00

I am officially on Spring Break! Yippee. On Friday, I took charlotte to day care while I cleaned. I've never worked so hard! Every time I wanted a break, I had to remember that this was my one chance to get this stuff done! I vacuumed the house from tippy top to the very bottom and even did all the crevices. I cleaned the kitchen and both bathrooms. I did a load of laundry and one of diapers. I cleaned Charlotte's room. I got her four hours later and was exhausted! Still, I went for a walk with Charlotte and Jen and Kiera since the weather was nice and this time of year you just can't count on that all the time.

On Saturday we went to Muskegon and spent the day with my grandma and my dad. It was a really lovely day and we had fun. Some of the photos are posted on Charlotte's site and I can't remember how to link a site to here, so you'll have to copy and paste it in. http://web.mac.com/bake3310/iWeb/Charlotte%20Jane/St.%20Patrick%27s%20Day%20and%20Gigi.html

Today we just chilled at home for most of the day and then we went to target. I only needed a couple of things, but walked away with more, like usual. One great find was these sunglasses for Charlotte. It was chilly, so she had her hat on, she isn't going snowboarding or anything!

Charlotte has also just learned how to make high-pitched squealing noises. These are very fun to make and therefore must be made often. She also seems to have gotten her first cold. She has a very runny nose and when she sneezes, great rivers of clear snot come out. It doesn't seem to have slowed her down, though. I use the aspirator (my sister told me I'd need these and I thought she was crazy until now) and suck out as much as I can. I also put a rolled up blanket under the crib mattress so she's on an incline for drainage and I have a humidifier with eucalyptus scent going in her room.

2007-03-27T18:39:00.000-04:00

Dave is out of town. In Ohio, Columbus I think. He'll be gone until April 6 I think, so that is very sad and we miss him dearly. Meanwhile, Charlotte and I are doing alot of hanging out. I'm so thankful for the warm weather and the jogging stroller we got. It is really nice to go over all the bumpy sidewalks around us. I have this two mile path I take for walks. I never noticed how incredibly hilly that path is until I was pregnant and huffed and puffed and I thought, after this baby, I'll have such an easier time. But now with the stroller I still struggle and the darn thing is on wheels!

Yesterday I felt inspired and decided to jog a little with the jogger. I learned many things: 1. I can't go further than a block or so. 2. Somehow, it made my arms sore 3. That goodness I was wearing dark short because I peed my pants. Yes, a sad fact of having a baby is that your pee muscles are decimated. They say to do your Kegel exercies (these can stop the flow of urine so you know when you're working them). I did not take this nearly seriously enough! I can't stop my pee, let alone not pee while running. I didn't even think I had to Pee! So pregnant women listen closely: Do your kegels! Because peeing while you run is pretty crappy.

Charlotte may be giving up her evening nap, darn it. She didn't take one yesterday, though she is blessedly asleep right now. This is why I have time to type this. That and the fact that I did crock pot dinner and have no intention of cleaning anything up. She is sleeping through the night, though and I'm thankful for that. She is a little doll and I love her soooooo much. What a wonderful thing, a child.

Oh, and see more pictures of "Charlotte's fourth month": http://web.mac.com/bake3310/iWeb/Charlotte%20Jane/4th%20Month.html

Sleeping like a Baby

2007-03-12T20:21:00.000-04:00

Great news! Charlotte has now, for two weeks, repeatedly taken the bottle. After a few days of taking it (about 4 ounces each), I asked Linda to try more. I pump more than that at work so I figured she really needed more. The doctor also suggested 6 ounce bottles. Today she had 6.5 at 11 and then 5 ounces at 2 pm. I think this is helping the sleep. She slept through the night for the first time in a while last Monday night, then again Wednesday, then Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I think we're in! I feel better, but it will take a while to really recover from four months without sleep.

I took her to Baby Beloved today to weigh her. 18 lbs. So no gain in two weeks, but that is fine. She's still giant. I tried to show the lady there her tooth, but it's gone!! I guess it went back down. But it WAS there! Plain as day. I'm sad it's gone, mostly since now we'll have to go through it all again.

Work sucks, of course. I can handle it, but I don't like it. Just so hard to work full time and have her. Plus, Dave is headed out of town for a three-week stint at the end of March. Darn.

Cautious Optomism

2007-02-25T17:00:00.000-05:00

Good-ish news: Friday, Linda said that Charlotte finally took the bottle. She actually sucked down two four ounce bottles. This is somewhat less than I'd expect her to eat, but we are excited that she actually drank it like she should instead of the chewing thing. Friday night I went out and bought two pacifiers and nipples to match the one that she took (Nuk, by the way, size medium...I had the small ones and she won't take those). Saturday morning Dave tried to give her the bottle but she'd have none of it. Darn. But I remain hopeful that she'll get back to taking it this week. I'm not eager for work Monday, but I'm eager to find out how well she does. Especially with conferences this week...it would be so great if she'd take a bottle in the evening too so I don't have to feed her all night.

She has been kind of fussy this weekend and she's chewing on everything. Probably teething, we thought. she was chewing on my finger and I felt something sharp, and sure enough, there is a tiny white bud that is sort of sharp on her lower gums. Not in the typical place though, halfway between front and middle. I'd guess the third tooth over. Sort of sad....she is getting old so fast. But it'll probably recede again anyway.

Feeling Down

2007-02-20T18:04:00.000-05:00

Today was sort of crappy, but it is mostly the culmination of crappy and the realization of more crappy to come. At school I feel so uninspired. I don't like my job. I don't like teaching, or what is teaching for these kids. I deal with so much crap. I don't mind planning, grading, helping kids. But I can't stand these lumps that don't do anything, then give you attitude and all you're trying to do is help them. They are so lazy and ungrateful. It is so much work to keep them to high standards and I just don't have the energy for that right now. I'm so tired from being up all the time. And I worry constantly about Charlotte. I know she could stand to lose a couple of pounds and I know she is reasonably happy. But I need MY freedom. I have conferences next week and I don't know what I'll do. She'll hardly eat all day and then I guess she won't eat at night because I won't be there. I'll just have to get up four times at night to feed her. I'm just so tired and beaten down.

I make good money teaching so it seems a shame to give it up. But what it has turned into...the kids we're getting. They're assholes and I'm sick of it. Their parents are assholes and I'm sick of that. I work ten times harder than them and it still doesn't make a difference. Sure, I have good kids, but looking to the future...where are the good kids? Not around here. I hear that the sixth graders are awful. They probably are. I should get out of this before I go postal. But I guess I'll have to finish the year. I don't know how I'll even finish the week.

I keep kleenex in the back room because I sit back there and pump and cry.

Back at Work

2007-02-14T17:45:00.000-05:00

The first day was better than expected, but the second was horrible! Charlotte wouldn't take ANY milk from the bottle Monday. She took about 6 ounces Tuesday, and about 6 on Wednesday. I was hoping to see improvement, but she just chews the nipple and then swallows. She won't even suck! It makes me sad, and then she wants to nurse alot when we get her home. Which is okay since it is nice time to spend together. The first night she got up alot extra to eat, and then last night she didn't get up until 5 am (this was unfortunate timing since I woke up to pee at 4:30, the cat kept me up until 5, then she woke up at 5:15 to eat...and I got up at 6. I'm pretty darned tired.

The hardest thing right now about being back to work is that some of kids are being awful. The middle of winter...cabin fever...I'm sick of these disrespectful squirrelly kids.

Now it is Thursday and I'm still really really tired. Really. I can't wait for her to go to bed so that I can. Dave is being great, helping care for Charlotte. I'm so excited to see her at 3:30 when I get home...but then I'm not quite sure what to do with her. I feel like I need to maximize every moment with her since I'm not with her all day...but that's pretty hard.

Wednesday she took six ounces and today she took only four. I tried to feed her from the bottle to show her that it is okay, but that was not surprisingly met with lots of crying. So I just feed her. Am I teaching her that she doesn't have to eat during the day? What am I supposed to do...not feed her?! yeah, right. but the good news is that tuesday and wednesday nights she awoke only once. But again, I'm still pretty darn tired. I'm showing a movie in science so at least that's easy. Basically the easier the work is for the kids, the easier it is for me. it is only middle school and they won't remember anything anyway. Right?

Thrush, Rings, Work, and Sleep

2007-02-09T21:04:00.000-05:00

Well, the thrush is still on Charlotte's tongue. I'm on a 13 day course of diflucan (antifungal) and now she is also. I called the ped. and she gave us the diflucan just today. I just have to squirt 1 ml in every day, not too bad. I started the nystatin again on Thursday and I already notice it getting better, but I think I'll do both for a little while to knock this thing out.

I'm starting to get used to the pretty ring. I feel like it isn't bad to replace my old one because Dave and I started a new chapter with Charlotte. I wouldn't have chosen the princess cut, but it is growing on me. Sometimes I don't know what is best for me. Usually Dave does.

Today i did a test run for driving to day care and work. I'm glad I did since it took more time to get her ready and drive from day care to work than I thought. I'm used to just dinking around with her in the mornings and taking my time. She's so bright and fun and just likes to smile...I need to start earlier so that we can still enjoy that. On the drive to work from day care I'll have to avoid the EGR school traffic, it took ten minutes to go two miles!

The rest of the day went pretty well. I'm not used to getting up at 6, but I'll have to get used to it pretty fast next week. Charlotte took a few naps today. She took one pretty late, at 6:00 until 6:30. Then she went to bed at 8:30, which is a little later than usual, but she went down SO WELL! She's been crying and has to be rocked to sleep for the last two or three weeks. But tonight she fell asleep feeding and I put her right down, which is great. Then I remembered that I forgot to put a disposable diaper on her....I wasn't sure if she was poopy or what and so I grit my teeth and went back in, unswaddled her and changed her diaper. Of course she woke up, but I swaddled her back up and put her in bed awake and thought I'd just try it. It seems to have worked...she's still asleep :-) if she can make it 20 minutes, she's usually down for the night. Now if I can just get her to NOT wake up for feeding in the night...it would be just great!

I'll be going into work tomorrow to take care of a few things and I did some planning while she napped today. It felt kind of good. I hope that I'll get the rest of the week planned tomorrow. Jen is watching Charlotte while I work for a couple of hours.

Ichiban- the lipstick for babies

2007-02-07T20:28:00.000-05:00

Charlotte's purple mouth is starting to fade and I think we're both finally getting over the thrush. We started swaddling her at night and this seems to make a big difference. You wouldn't think a baby would like her arms pinned to her sides, but she seems to sleep better like that and even slept through the night Monday night when I swaddled her tight. Last night I swaddled her, but not real tight and she got up at 3:30 and she was out of it.

I've got lots on my mind about going back to work and I need to start writing stuff down so I stop obsessing about it. Just stuff about Charlotte, what to tell the day care, what to pack, how to set up the bottle stuff, etc. I thought I was coming to terms with back to work, but I cried about it again today. There is just no getting around it, I will have a really tough time, just like every other working mom. At least I only have 4 months and then summer!

Dave gave me quite a surprise. I had requested more "bling" for our 5th wedding anniversary. When we got married, I picked out some plain bands and felt like that was right for me. But then I started noticing other ladies's lovely sparkles. So I thought a nice channel set sparkly band (or two) would complement my ring nicely. But Dave gave me this:

You'll notice that it isn't my engagement stone. It's a whole new ring. The center stone is twice the size and the others add up to alot more than I thought I'd have. He said, "I know it is more that you wanted, but it is what you deserve". Very sweet. I'm not sure about it, I feel sad for my other rings, which we could make into necklaces. I generally prefer round brilliant cut to the princess square. I have 30 days to return it. Again, my original stone means so much. I just don't know. What do you think?

Purple Pie Gal of Porcupine Peak

2007-02-06T20:31:00.000-05:00

Or shall I call her Purplesaurus Rex? Or maybe a Purple People Eater? Whatever you call her, she's cute!

I used Gentian violet to try to rid Charlotte and I of thrush (now I have real purple-nurples). It freaked me out the first morning when I saw her purple stained face, but I think it is working. Coincidentally, Charlotte also has found her tongue. She loves to stick it out, waggle it around, and show it off. Check out the video:

Our trip to Cleveland

2007-02-05T20:34:00.000-05:00

Last weekend Dave and I headed back to his mom's house in Cleveland. I was nervous taking the baby so far and we haven't spent the night anywhere but home yet. but the ride was good, she slept the whole time. We stopped at the border and fed her. We left at 1:00 and got there at 6:30.

We got our pic taken for his mom's birthday (his sister's idea) and it was very nice. I just got my haircut and hadn't figured out how to do it best yet. Today I felt like I finally liked it. Too late!

Our trip home was memorable. We stopped again at the border this time to gas up and found that our headlights and brake lights were out! Scary. With the crummy weather, headlights are necessary, and brake lights are always necessary. But we didn't want to leave the car on the other side of he state and have to go back to get it somehow. So we decided to chance it and drove straight home. This was tough since the baby was supposed to eat at 3:30 and we got home at 5:30 and man was she hungry!

I took the car in today and we need a new light modulator. They gave us a loaner that is rather nice, a BMW X3, it's a 2007 SUV and it has a heated stearing wheel!

While we were in cleveland I was experiencing alot of pain and soreness in my right breast and I called my sister who said that she had plugged ducts and to use a hot water bottle on it. I also called the lactation consultants at Baby Beloved and they gave me some interesting suggestions. one was to feed baby in football hold and Australian hold (baby sits on lap straddling leg) and to feel "on all fours". I did these things and it looks like I'm all better :-) this is good since a plugged duct could develop into mastitis and be infected and need medicine and be really really painful.

So one week left til I go back to work. Gradually preparing myself even though there is no real preparation.

Do I have to go back to work?

2007-01-31T15:13:00.000-05:00

The answer is no, but reasonably, it would be stupid not to. If I chose to not finish the year (take a "Child care leave" I'd not only forfeit the rest of my years pay, which is indeed reasonable, but I'd also be responsible for paying back my insurance premiums. I'm told that is in the neighborhood of 15K. That's a new car. It would just be stupid to do that.

So instead, I'm returning for the 16 weeks left to finish out the year. I cry every time I think about it. It isn't just that I don't want to work (hey, who really does?), the issue is being away from Charlotte. I just want to be with her and take care of her. Not slave away for ungrateful urchins all day and see my daughter for like three hours at night.

She is being slightly crabbier than usual and I suspect the three month growth spurt is the culprit. However, I need to keep an eye on her getting up in the middle of the night, which has happened for the past 7 days. She had gone to sleeping through the night most nights, but now I get a 1 or 2 am wakeup. I feed her, but it is possible she is just waking up and needs to go back to sleep. So we need to have Dave comfort her (because mom=food) and try just getting her back down. Even with the crabbiness she is really just a doll and I adore her.

Monday we went to visit my sister and her kids. We looked at baby books for Sophia and Sam and they pretty much look the same now. So even though I wonder what Charlotte will look like, she'll just look like herself, as she is now. Speaking of which, we took some pics that are super-duper cute. They show how well she holds herself up, the other one is just funny because she was hungry but I wanted to take a picture. Not a good idea- the baby is ALWAYS the boss!

Baby Update

2007-01-23T21:06:00.000-05:00

We took a family picture last weekend. Charlotte is wearing the dress I made :-)

Yeast update: we have an appointment with the pediatrician on Friday to ascertain whether the thrush is receding rapidly enough. Also, my ob won't give me more cream unless the ped. says I still need to be treated. I'm out of cream and it is a great relief not to be applying and removing that crud 7 times a day. I also don't need to go through 16 breast pad a day.

Bottle Battle: yesterday, i took Charlotte to day care (Linda) for a trial run and hoping for bottle success. I took her there around 8:30 and just worried alot. I called at 11 am and she had tried the bottle a couple of times and said Charlotte didn't seem hungry (though I know she was, she ate 4 hours previously and before that it had been 9 hours). Then I called again at noon and she had some success. I guess Charlotte was sort of sleepy and finally latched on and took about 5 ounces. I picked her up and when we got home she napped and when she woke up was just frantic to eat. When I tried to burp her she went nuts and just couldn't get enough!

So, although it was a bit of a battle, she did actually take the damn thing and I don't think I have to worry that she'll hold out all day when I go back to work. I'll be taking her back sometime next week for another day.

Sleep: After a week of a super cranky baby at night, I finally realized she was just tired and needed to be put down earlier. Now she eats around 8:30 and is typically in bed by 9 pm. She now has slept until 7 am (with no feeds in between) a few days. I hope it continues and I am getting used to sleeping all night as long as the stupid cats don't wake me up!

Also, I joined a mom group, Mothers and More and look forward to being part of that. There are monthly meetings, playgroups to join, email listserves, activities such as wine tasting and sledding and probably lots more. I'm very excited about this and hope to be active even though I go back to work in 2.5 weeks.

Charlotte movie

2007-01-20T22:09:00.000-05:00

This baby is just so darn cute! She is cooing and making cute noises. This started January 1 and it's so fun to hear her because she sounds so happy. No laughs, yet.

more pictures

2007-01-19T12:05:00.000-05:00

We cuddle on the floor.

Charlotte under her play gym- she really likes this thing, the mirror and the jinglies.

Charlotte in her pretty dress from jen flanigan.

The stupid cats on the changing table.

The Yeastie Beasties

2007-01-19T11:08:00.000-05:00

Nearly every week at a breastfeeding group I go to, the consultants bring up the topic of thrush, or an oral yeast infection in the baby. Also, if you're breastfeeding you get it on your nipples, too. Several weeks ago, I noticed that Charlotte has some white on her tongue but I thought it was milk.

At her 2 month dr. appt. they noticed she might have thrush. I asked the consultants to look at it and yep, she definitely had it. So we got some oral Nystatin medication to be swabbed in her mouth and swallowed four times a day. We did this for a few days, but I was told by the lactation consultants that I should be treated too so it doesn't just get passed back and forth between us. So I called my ob and he gave me a Nystatin cream to be applied all the times I'm not nursing.

This was two weeks ago. My symptoms got worse (shooting pains in my breasts) and Charlotte started to clear up, but it looks like it is coming back. So I called ob again asking for a systemic antifungal pill and I got two. The literature I have says that I should have that pill for 14-21 days! Stupid, stupid. I'm so sick of giving the baby medicine and putting that damn cream on and then wiping it off 8 times a day!

In better news, Charlotte went from 9:30 pm til 6:30 am last night between feeds! Bad news is that now she has the evening fussies. but we're dealing with that.

The Bottle Battle

2007-01-18T10:17:00.000-05:00

Anyone I've talked to recently has probably heard an earful about Charlotte and the bottle. This issue is driving me insane! We tried a bottle with Charlotte when she was three weeks old. It went okay. She took a bottle a few more times, though she took less milk, then only took it with a fight, then not at all. So when she was about six weeks she just wouldn't take it at all.

It wouldn't be a big deal if I weren't going back to work, but seriously, what will the child eat? So we've tried every bottle and nipple on the market. We used gerber, nuk, mam, soothie, dr. brown...I even tried the "breast bottle"...yep, it actually looks like a boob. Then last Saturday we had success! Dave used the brown playtex type and she took it in the morning and then another in the afternoon. yea!

Then Sunday we went to Muskegon and were on the road and didn't give her a bottle. So we tried again Monday- No way. Tuesday- No way. Wednesday- No way.

I've had it! So much anxiety from this!!I am so worried about when I go back to work in three weeks what she'll do...I guess we'll just try every day. I have some hope since she took it out of the blue on Saturday, but I don't know what the trick is to get her to take one from day to day. Boo hoo.

Merry Christmas

2007-01-15T13:29:00.000-05:00

Christmas was good, Here are some pictures (I forgot to rotate the one of mom and Charlotte, just turn your head):

Okay, only a few weeks late, but Daddy prompted me to update and I feel obligated to go back to where we left off.

Christmas was good. Little Charlotte is just a champ at parties, she mostly sleeps and when she's awake she only cries when she's hungry. We did Christmas eve at mom's for whole Corridin side of the family then drove back home (since there was no snow it was nice) and then we drove back to Ski-town on Christmas day to celebrate with just mom. Then in the afternoon we went to Dad's. Highlights include:
Grandma gave us a water buffalo, well a donation of one to a needy family through "Heifer International"
Chip loved his "Aaaarghhhh ya free Saturday night?" tee-shirt.
We made Daddy cry with the offer of tickets to fly to Germany when he wants.
Alot of yummy food.
Charlotte slept 7 hours on the night of Christmas as a little gift to me :-)
I got some sweet magnets that are tiny but super strong and fun to play with.
I got some nice sweaters from Dave.

Good Charlotte

2006-12-21T11:25:00.000-05:00

Charlotte is now six weeks old and is just a charmer. She is getting better at smiling and cooing and I find that she has her father's temperament (thank goodness!). As I meet and talk to other moms I am finding out indeed what a good baby she is. She loves parties, though she gets pretty sleepy being held all the time!

She is still eating in 2.5-3 hour intervals day and night. Except yesterday when I suspect the six week growth spurt is what made her go only 2 hours at night! No sleep for mommy. I wake up in the morning so darn tired and I stumble down to her room and am often greeted by a gummy smile that makes morning more bearable. She wakes at 9 am every day, regardless of her last feeding. I'm still not sure when to put her down for the night...it is often around 10 pm and I'd like it to be a little sooner. She tends to have long stretches of awake and long stretches of sleep as opposed to sleep/wake/sleep/wake for short bits.

The cats still don't seem to realize that Charlotte is a real person, they pretty much ignore her. She is becoming aware of them, though and I can see her watching them sometimes. Especially Hobbes since he likes to join us for feeding. I end up with a boppy, a baby, and stupid cat on my lap. At least it is warm.

I'm happy being at home, though I am so thankful for having Jen around to go to the mall and breastfeeding group with. Too many days at home all day is boring no matter how much stuff needs to be done. i don't want to go back to work, but I'm lucky that I still have about 7 weeks left at home (that's longer than some mom's get all together!). We found day care. Her name is Linda and she lives in east grand rapids on the way to work for Daddy. She has been doing daycare for 30 years and has 5 grown kids of her own. There are 3 other kids in the daycare and they seem to be quite nice! We'll probably visit a couple of times before I have to bring her there for all day.

David and Goliath

2006-12-05T18:04:00.000-05:00

My husband is obsessed with getting that damn squirrel (goliath) out of the attic. He is apparently getting hungry since I went into the attic to get pre-pregnancy clothes and it appears that he found my stash of marzipan. Clearly a North American squirrel, he cared not for the almond filling and simply ate the chocolate off the outside of it. Further evidence of his presence was the squirrel pee I had the misfortune of stepping in. Then I went in again and found my secret stash of ritter sport had also been broken into.

David, Meanwhile, got a small catch and release cage, but the bugger kept setting it off without being trapped. We now have a giant one (I think it might catch a hippo) with the tempting bait of peanut butter. I hope I don't have any more secret sweets stashes for him to find.

In other news, I'm slowly losing my mind as a stay-at-home mom. I feel terribly guilty about my feelings, but I can't help but feel so trapped. I feel like that character in greek mythology who had his liver eaten out by a bird every day, only for it to grow back again to have the same thing repeated the next day. I change her diaper only to have her pee or poop right onto my hand as I'm wiping her bum and then when I finally get her into a clean one, it is only to know we'll go through the same ordeal in about two hours more. When she sleeps during the day I worry that she won't sleep at night. When she's up during the day, I worry that she isn't ever going to get to sleep. When I'm most tired and ready for bed, she's super jazzed up and won't sleep. When she surprised me and goes down early, I can't sleep! When I try to nap I can't sleep and when I'm dog tired, she wants to eat.

Don't get me wrong...I love her dearly and think she's just the cutest darn thing ever. But it really wears on you. This trapped feeling of living life in 2.5 hour increments and being at the mercy of the most unpredictable thing ever. Tonight Dave went to Lowe's and I cried because after he left I realized that it sounded really fun to get out of the house and go. So I gave Charlotte a bath and made the water too hot I guess and she screamed bloody murder. Then after we were done and she was being dried off, she spit up all over her clean self and I devolved into another set of tears. I'm also pretty sure I'm not eating enough. Which is funny. I can't say I haven't wanted to lose that baby weight (not out of vanity, just want to have clothes that fit). I think I need to eat more, and keep it healthy which is hard.

I now know that parenting is just something you have to go through to understand (kind of like pregnancy). Even the best babies are hard to take care of. The constancy of putting another first is very wearing. A month without a full nights sleep sucks. I have no patience for not knowing what she really needs or wants when she cries.

But...I think she's starting to smile and I love that. She's fun to dress up. She is usually really good and spends most of the day in an agreeable state. I think she's starting to recognize me and she loves me because I feed her.

A very good birthday

2006-12-01T17:01:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was the first day Charlotte and I were on our own; Daddy went back to work on his birthday. We had a good, and a busy, day. We went to the bf group at 12:30 and then to the mall with Jen. I was able to borrow a stroller frame that fits the baby car seat into it from Jenny Cleveland. It was fun! We were shopping for a christmas present for Daddy. We got a grill remote that alarms when your food reaches temperature. Unfortunately, daddy didn't actually want that. Even when I showed him it listed on his list in his own writing. But that's okay. It was the thought that counted.

Then we went out to eat. Our first outing since the baby! We went to Outback and I had a great time! A steak, cheese fries, and even a big beer. The baby slept. She was in the car seat pretty much all day, so she slept pretty much all day. But that's okay.

Then we went to the mall to return the bad gift and we went to Victoria's secret to get free underwear and we stopped at the jewelry store to look into upgrading my wedding rings. I think I'll take a Dave birthday like this every year!

In other news, we had a lovely visit with Dave and Susan on Wednesday afternoon and we are very much looking forward to the upcoming THanksmas holiday. It took me a couple of days to recover from the sickness. I can hardly believe how tired I was. Even going DOWN the stairs was tough. It helped me lose weight, though. I supposedly only have 10 pounds left to lose. I put on "regular" jeans today and they are tight! Of course, I haven't worn anything that didn't have spandex in the top in months. I don't remember what regular clothes feel like. I also am sad to report that I have a "muffin top". THis is the fat that hangs over the top of your jeans. I have NEVER had that before. I'm not too upset, I mean, it has been almost a month and I'll give myself at least 6 months to get back near to "normal". I just hope I can be like before...such a flat, nice tummy. I don't even care so much about stretch marks. I have a few, but they don't really seem bad.

Sick and Tired

2006-11-27T16:05:00.000-05:00

So last night I was giving Dave the middle of the night feeding; this is usually around 3 to 5 am. That way I'd be able to sleep from about midnight hopefully until about 6 or 7. But at 3:00 I woke up and had an upset stomach. SO I told Dave, never mind, I'd just feed her at 3:30 since I was awake anyway. Dave was a trooper and he got up with me anyway. I told him I didn't feel well, almost like I was going to throw up. I used the bathroom and there was some scary diarrhea. Remember, I'm still taking a stool softener, so that didn't help anything.But I fed her and when I was done went back to bed.

It's funny, when you're sick how at first you think "I don't want to be sick, I hope I don't throw up", then you feel awful and think, "maybe I"ll feel better if I throw up", then it turns into "I need to throw up, I feel so terrible. I couldn't sleep and at 4:30 got up and puked. I was glad for it by then because I felt so yucky. The diarrhea continued and the puking and I was getting really worried about whether or not I should feed Charlotte. It is one thing for me to be sick and miserable, but my tiny 3 week old baby?? Dave again got up with me for the 5:30 feeding and we called the pediatrician to ask if I should still breastfeed. She said, yes, it was okay, but make sure wash my hands and nipples because the sickness won't go through the breastmilk, but it will go still be transmitted through spit and the usualy methods.

I'm used to getting little sleep, but last night, I got NONE! I was up to vomit or poop or feed, or all three, all night long. I had a terrible fever, but couldn't keep anything down, including Ibuprofen. I had Dave make some jello and I kept breastfeeding since I was awake and couldn't sleep. I fed her around 11:30 and asked Dave to use the bottle on the next feeding so that I could rest. I finally had some jello at about 1:30 and kept it down so I took some ibuprofen and my fever broke. I woke up at 2:50 drenched in sweat, I was in bed in my flannel jammies and my robe, just shivering until then. SO I got up to wash the vomit out of my hair and wash the sweat off, and I feel much better now.

Nothing like sickness helps you to appreciate health! I feel so weak since I usually drink about 4 liters of water a day, and today I had a glass or two and a bowl of jello. I ate some soup at 3 and I"m working on replenishing my fluids.

Little Charlotte is blessedly unaffected by whatever this sickness was. But I was totally out of commission. I had this list of things I wanted to do today (including get a christmas tree) but I'll be happy to just keep making it through the day without puking more. I'm so lucky Dave was already home today...I don't think I could've taken care of Charlotte and me in that condition.

Do yourself a favor and just stop and feel thankful for your health- whether you're tired or have a cold, or whatever, at least you aren't emptying the entire contents of your body into the toilet. That is something to be thankful for.

T + 3 weeks

2006-11-26T14:45:00.000-05:00

We are now three weeks out from Charlotte's birth. I feel pretty lucky to have Dave home for three weeks, but I think I'm getting spoiled! Things are going pretty well, here is an update:
Breasts: doing well, not bleeding or chapped, though it hurts when she initially latches on.
"Bottom": Good, I'm not afraid of pooping any more.
Sleep: Better, getting about two hours at a time in three shifts at night. Try to take naps, but still struggle to do more than an hour at a time. Had Dave give her a bottle this morning in a vain effort to get more sleep, but the timing was bad since he got the 8 o'clock feeding, and it was light and I woke up anyway...
House: Not clean, but not a disaster. Still so thankful to Mom for cleaning my bathrooms. Seriously, she cleaned (including mopping the floor) both bathrooms.
School: Who cares! :-)
Charlotte: Freakin' adorable!! Starting to look more like...a person and less like a generic baby. Hair is getting longer, but still not curling like I want. She is pretty good and stays awake for long stretches, but sometimes I think too long....she gets a little crabby because I think she's fighting sleep. Her most crabby period occurs right when I'm trying to go to bed, somewhere between 9 and 11 pm. She is almost always fussy then. But the good news is that the pacifier seems to work pretty well when we need it.

So my days still consist of pretty much feedding the baby, feeding myself, and then waiting to feed the baby. Oh, and trying to nap and getting pissed off when I think I've slept for three hours and then look at the clock and it's been 45 minutes.

I think I'm going to try to have a "goal" or a trip to do every day. That way I have something to look forward to. Maybe just the bf (breastfeeding) group, or a trip to the store or mall, or maybe even cleaning something here at home!

I have to give props to my husband for doing such a great job. He's not perfect, but I guess nobody can read my mind exactly :-) Good old Dave is taking care of stuff that needs taking care of around the house (though it takes him away from me a little), he is on laundry duty, dutifully dousing dirty diapers and all other laundry, and he watches the baby when I ask. THis last task is usually letting her lay on the couch next to him as he is on the computer, but it works. ONe of hte most important things he does is tells me to chill out. This is essential. And it might not seem like I appreciate it, but I do.

THanksgiving was nice. On "thanksgiving eve" we went to Muskegon to my cousin's house for Grandma's 87th birthday. It was her first time seeing the baby and I think it is extra special since I named her after Grandma's mother, Charlotte Jane Williams. It was a good time, there were lots of people to show off the baby to. (how do I nod end that sentence with preposition? Lots of people to whom to show off the baby?). ANyway, on Thanksgiving I went back to Muskegon to Mom's and she did a bang-up job on the dinner! Chip brought some great brussell sprouts with a white sauce and I made some tasty pumpkin pies. Mom did the rest (thanks, mom). We ate, I napped (albeit a short one), we hung out, ate again, and got home in time for Dave's mom (who visited this weekend) to watch Grey's Anatomy.

Dave goes back to work on THursday, but before then, I'd like to get a Christmas tree and allow him the joy of middle of the night feedings for a few days. THen Charlotte and I will be on our own until February when (gasp!) I have to go back to work. Boo.

Two weeks old today!

2006-11-19T19:45:00.000-05:00

Wow, the last two weeks have been amazing....ly hard!! YOu take all these classes, and read books, and talk to people for 9 months to prepare for labor. Then it is done in about a day, and before you know it, you're sent home with a new baby and no clue about what to do! If you're the laid-back type, you probably don't have a problem with this. But I'm not. I've spent every spare moment (though there aren't many) on the internet or with my nose in a book trying to figure out what "normal" is and what I"m supposed to do.

Being a mother apparently comes with a Ginormous guilty conscience and incredible amounts of self doubt. Add this to the serious lack of sleep and you get insanity. I know everyone talks about the lack of sleep, but what I've experienced so far simple can't be conveyed unless by actual experience.

At first, you're supposed to "demand-feed" your baby. Feed her when she wants to eat. Should be about 8 to 12 times in 24 hours, or every 2 or 3 hours. Fine. But what about when she wants more than that? The breastfeeding people (this isn't really a club, but an assortment of support group and lactation therapists) tell you, yes, some babies want to eat almost every hour. That is normal for some babies. It is called "cluster feeding" and it is really hard, but still okay.

Charlotte doesn't always want to eat every hour, usually it just happens at night. I'd go to bed at 9:30, toss and turn for an hour even though I'm exhausted my mind is racing and can't sleep til 10:30. Then Dave brings her up at 11:30 for feeding. This lasts an hour or so. I put her back down (12:30). Then she's up at 1:30 or 2:00. Feed for an hour, put her down at 3:00. She's up at 3:30, Oh, I guess she's not done. So I feed another 1/2 or so more. Fine, put her down at 4:00. She's up at 5:00. I ask Dave to settle her, I just fed her 1.5 hours worth, she can't be hungry. But somehow she is. I feed again, maybe just 30 minutes this time, and put her down at 5:30 and she sleeps til 7:00. Then she's up again for feeding. I get done at 7:45 and head back to bed, but she's up again at 9:00 and by that time, I'm up for the day, or I"m supposed to be.

Imagine this scenario for about 14 days. During the day I nap if I can, but usually can't get more than 1.5 hours at a stretch.

This is until yesterday. Dave went to DiGennaro's to brew and I was alone for the first time. I had a crummy (usual) night and woke up at 10:30 ish. I showered and ate lunch. Fed her at 11:00. Tried to nap from 12:30 to 1:30, no can do. Mind racing.

Jen calls and I'm in tears, I just can't take any more!! She says I should come over, and I decide to because I can't even think. Dave comes to get me (I still can't drive and really shouldn't in that state anyway). I'm balling and I get to Jen's balling and basically having a melt-down. I feed Charlotte and Jen gives me a pair of ear plugs and tells me to nap on her bed, she'll take the baby. I say it won't matter because she'll want to eat in 30 minutes anyway. But I lay down.

Two hours later, they get me. I got two hours of sleep! IN a row!! but have a royal headache from all the crying. Jen says that Charlotte sucked on Jen's finger for about an hour!! Huh, maybe she doesn't actually want to feed all the time, maybe she just needs a pacifier. Now, how come I never even thought of that?? Well, I didn't want to use a pacifier...nipple confusion. If an infant is trying to nurse and has a plastic nipple, she sometimes can't get the right suck for nursing.

Screw nipple confusion! Get me a pacifier! Since I woke up from that nap, where Charlotte was actually away from me long enough to work up a good appetite, which meant she ate well and then followed it by sleeping well, she has been a new baby.

Last night I fed her at 9:30, 1 am, 4 am, and 7 am. And, she only ate for about 30 minutes each time. I got about 10 hours of sleep. NOt in a row, of course, which does make a difference. But wow. ANd then today, the same thing. She's eating about every 2.5 to 3 hours. And she's been pretty good.

Jen and I went to the store and got pacifiers last night, but I haven't had to use it much. She doesn't seem to really like it, but then again, putting it in her mouth if she is actually hungry isn't going to work anyway. I did try it right after I fed her and put her down and she fussed a little. I put it in and sat down to write thank you's and she was quiet and so I thought, great, she loves it, but when I looked, she spat it out and was just sleeping. That is fine! I just want her to be quiet when necessary and wait a good amount of time for a feeding so that the feeding if full, not a "snack".

Oh, and infants are incredibly noisy!! They grunt and gurgle and sometimes cry out, then are quiet. They breathe loud and fast sometimes, and just when you want them to be quiet, they are and then you're up to check that they are still breathing!! I don't know how much longer she'll stay in the bassinett in our room, we might need to move her to the nursery so I can sleep a little better.

I feel better today, but one night of "better" sleep isn't exactly a cure-all. I"m still exhausted, but today I managed to clean off my desk, clean the kitchen, write a few thank-you's and chat with a few friends. If this keeps up, I'll be so happy...I just couldn't take anymore of the "night monster". But each night, I worry when the sun goes down. I dread the night because it was such hell. Maybe in a few days if this new schedule works out, the night won't seem so daunting.

God bless every mom. Tell your mom you love her and you're grateful.

My baby story- the arrival of Charlotte Jane

2006-11-08T21:45:00.000-05:00

Warning: this post contains information that may be more than you wanted to know.

Okay, I've got lots to take care of and do (especially sleep) but I wanted to get this down before I forget the details.

First, Charlotte was about a week earlier than I thought she'd be, and about two weeks earlier than my doctor thought. So I planned to take care of all kinds of details on Sunday and just relax this week and prepare for the baby. Stuff I had to do included: Pack hosptial bag, get changing table and diaper pails set up, buy stuff at target/babies r us, clean the house, buy thank you notes, etc.

Instead, I chose to use my last free day at "teach a friend to homebrew day", which was nice and fun. It was a long day, we were at Hoffmaster State park about 11 am and ended in a parking lot a few miles away about 6 or 7 pm (long story for another day there). I had chili and brats. That part is important later.

That night, I thought a bath would be nice, but when I got in to soak, my giant belly just stuck right out of the water so it wasn't as good as I'd hoped. I did take the chipped nail polish off my toes and repainted them (as well as I could reach) and I managed to shave my legs, which I was happy about later.

Dave and I started a movie and at 9:30, which is pretty lame, decided we were both exhausted and to just go to bed. I thought about how Jen told me, "any night you don't get sleep and feel crummy, you could go into labor the next day so pamper yourself and don't get too tired". But I thought I was safe for about a week.

At about 11 pm I started my usual waking up alot routine of discomfort, but it was different. I felt sort of sick. No contraction, not really nauseous, just not right. ANd I was waking up 20 to 35 minutes or so. I had crazy dreams that someone was in labor (yeah, I didn't think it was me) and then I felt like I wet the bed, but not becuase it wasn't a trickle and it wasn't under my control, it was a whoosh. so I staggered/dripped to the bathroom and it just kept coming. It was 3 am. I went downstairs and called Dr. Murphy and I was on the phone when Dave actually woke up (he sleeps like the dead) and he figured out what was happening. The doctor told me to go to the hospital and I asked if it was alright if it took a little while since I wasn't even packed yet. He said it sounded like I wasn't having real contractions so it was okay. Dave got in the shower and I packed (thought I forgot all kinds of stuff) and we got to the hospital about 4 am. We checked in and they put us in triage to make sure I was in labor or needed to be there (water breaking was a good reason, even if it is premature). I was feeling mild contractions that were about 5 minutes apart, but very tolerable. I breathed throught them alright and thought I was doing great. I was not dilated at all :-( but about 90% effaced.

I was transferred to a labor and delivery room at about 5 am and contractions continued and got stronger. Dave rested on the couch and I on the bed and I listened to my relaxation tapes and relaxed (or tried to) until about 6:20. The contractions were different than I thought they'd feel. I felt alot like I was taking a tough poop, there was loads of pressure on my butt and back. The abdomen wasn't doing much, except down really low. I was sure I was making tons of progress since the contractions were getting really strong. I begged them to check me. 1 cm. "that's it?!" I said. A little frustrating.

This basic pattern continued, gradually getting stronger. The new nurse came on at 7 am and I got in the tub at about 7:20. Pretty much the same experience as before with my tummy being out and cold. When I was on my side it was much more painful, so I didn't do that. David helped me as much as he could, but there was little he could do. After that for a while, they checked my dilation again. No progress. a cm, maybe plus a little, but not really. The nurse said that she noticed I wanted to have as natural a birth as possible (avoing pain killers) and I said that I was starting to change my mind, maybe if I was just at 1 cm. and it was already this bad.

It was weird because I knew I was having these really hard contractions and I think they were 2 to 4 minutes apart, which is pretty close and steady for no progress to happen. But my back was getting worse and worse. The pain was getting really tough to deal with. My body was having a hard time with it. Before the contractions, I'd start just shaking, pretty hard, then it'd go into the contraction. The shaking was scary becasue I knew it was coming! I'd wave Dave over and then when he tried to take my hand I'd push him away (I didn't want to crush his hand). Dave was calling folks to say what was going on and Andy called and suggested he rub my back. That helped. The nurse had me get into hands and knees position, but that was like being on my side- more painful!

This whole time, every contraction, more water is letting loose. I didn't know that the placenta continued making amniotic fluid. I felt like I was in a swamp! The nurse kept changing the pad and blankets and eventually had to get another linen bin because we went through so many!

I asked for an epidural at about 8:30 or 9 am and they called Dr. Murphy and he said he'd get there about 10:15 to check me. He wanted to make sure I was making progress so they put my on pitocin. THat was tough because I was already feeling at my limit for contractions and pitocin makes them harder, more powerful.So I dealt with that for while :-(

Dr. Murphy got there right when he said. He checked me and I was still pretty much at 1 cm!! He watched the pattern of contractions and since they were coming in doubles and triples and still 2-4 minutes apart, he told me was back labor, which I hadn't even thought of, I thought it was totally normal. But it made sense since my back was being severed (it felt like). I felt like such a baby since I was only at 1 cm and begging for epidural, but the nurse said she's seen women who've had a few natural births have back labor and get an epidural fast. The reason I had back labor was that she was turned facing up instead of down. The back of her head was pressing on my spine. Ouch!

Dr. Murphy thought maybe epidural was a good idea; if I got relaxed enough, maybe she'd turn over. You can have a baby in a posterior position, but it isn't easy and not everyone can do it. So great, get that guy in here with the drugs!! But he was having a busy morning and he didn't get there until 11:20. In the mean time I was really losing it. I asked for Jesus more than once and told Dave to just get away and I was in hands and knees to give her room to flip, but that didn't really help. They also put a monitor on her head (I guess it gets screwed into the scalp) for her heartbeat since she was under different pressure than usual and we wanted to make sure we knew what was going on with her).

At 11:15 or so, he finally got there and started the preparations for the epidural, which unfortunately took long than I thought it would. Having 3 or 4 contractions while having the drugs right there but not in my was hard. It was harder still that I was having to sit up without any thing to really lean on or grap on when they hit. After he got it in (and I was careful to do everything he asked since an epidural can possibly result in paralysis or be just on one side, or go into the wrong space and cause bad headaches if it isn't applied correctly) I felt better. I asked if it was psychosomatic, and they said, no, it was just starting to work.

I nearly cried with relief. I love epidural man! I actually slept a little and rested alot and just couldn't beleive that I felt so good. I'd watch the monitor show my contractions and marvel. So at 12:30 or so I was at about 4 cm. That's 3 cm in one hour, yea! AN hour later, at 1:30 I was at 7, half an hour later at 2 I was at 8, and at 2:30 had just a little left to go.

Here is a gross part: since I couldn't feel much and the contractions pushed against my rectum, I was farting quite a bit. Plus, I had a suspicion there was more than just gas there. Sure enough, the nurse cleared away a poopy sheet more than once). Remember those brats and chili? ew. But I know it is normal, I just don't think the smell level was normal.

By this time, she'd turned over :-) but then it was scary because her heart tones would drop every now and again. Not a big deal if it is a little bit, but her's were really tanking. This meant that the cord was likely wrapped around something.

This is scary because every contraction to move her down puts her at a risk of oxygen loss (read: brain damage when I heard it). The doctor said we might need a cesarean, and if so, it would be emergency and we'd have to use general anesthetic (not time to make sure the epidural was right). But he said we might be able to still do it vaginally. For that to happen, it was a race against getting her through the birth canal fast enough. That meant probably help (forceps) and hard pushing work. I asked about the vacuum, but her head was a little crooked still and he needed to turn her as she came out and the vacuum wouldn't be able to do that as well as forceps.

So we went for it; I pushed about every other or every two contractions to give her heartones a chance to normalize. For pushing contractions I pushed ten seconds three times in a row. Sometime in there I guess the doctor had to cut me (episiotomy) in order to get the forceps in. They look like shoe-horns. I didn't notice but I'm impressed Dave didn't pass out watching that!

THe nurse had one leg and Dave had the other and I grabbed the instep of each foot. I was glad we practiced this in yoga. I could see on the doctors gloves lots of blood and also some poo...it must have been a mess down there. It was hard to know where to push since (blessedly) I couldn't really feel it. But the doctor said I'm a champ because I only pushed for about 20 minutes, and I think a total of 6 or so contractions. When she came out, it sort of felt like a poop, but that makes sense since I had a third degree tear which goes from vagina into rectal muscles. It isn't the worst, though, a fourth degree goes into the rectum, ouch!

When she came out, at 4:04 pm, she wasn't at all cone-headed, and her color was good. She gave a good cry as the cord was cut. I guess they pulled the placenta out, but I didn't pay attention because they cleaned her off and I got to hold her. It was so beautiful! I think she's the thing I'm proudest of in my whole life- she is so perfect! A great mop of dark hair that was curly, and now seems straight.

It took about 30-40 minutes to make "repairs" to me. Again, SO SO SO glad for epidural man! They were done by about 5 pm and cleaned me up. I still smelled poopy when I shifted and let the nurse know...sure enough, alot of poopy mess underneath me. That was getting cleaned up as the first visitors arrived: daddy, my sister, then mom and Jim.

At 7 pm I was transferred to my recovery room. I had to be on a gurney since I kept almost passing out. I guess I lost alot of blood, plus I pass out sort of easily. I was pretty tired.

That is the story, though there is more to tell. Hard to explain to non-parents exactly how much time a little one takes. I had no idea, I thought people exaggerated it. Nope. Full time just recovering and feeding! But that is a whole other story.

"It's a big baby"

2006-11-02T20:50:00.000-05:00

Yesterday (Wednesday) I went to see the doctor. It was a good visit, although he told me that I shouldn't set my heart on delivering early because every day I go over will be that much harder. He said since my due date is Nov. 15, I might go a week late, which would put me at Thanksgiving! Good lord, I hope I don't go that long.

He did say that I'm "disabled" from working and that I should rest, and I agreed so tomorrow, the 3rd will be my last day. It is a tough decision because I know that my FMLA time starts right away and I'll only get twelve weeks off work, no matter when little Charlotte arrives. But I decided that I do need rest (desperately) and as long as I can have it (since I do have the studpid short term disability) I should take advantage to prepare myself metally and also just prepare the house. Like maybe cleaning a little :-)

The doctor said at first he expected the baby to be about 6.5 or 7 pounds, but then he felt (which isn't very comfortable) and said, whoa, she'd pretty far down there and she's not small. He thinks she might be about 7.5 now, so I could deliver her at 8.5 to 9.5 pounds. Not a surprise since I, myself, was 9.5 pounds.

As far as progress, he thinks I'm about 25% effaced (which refers to the thinning of the cervix). This means almost nothing. I could go into labor tomorrow, or in three weeks. I do think that positive thinking and me feeling ready might help. I haven't had any contractions, but I have felt a little crampy. I'm pretty excited and curious just to meet her and to find out what my "story" is.

I have mixed feeling about leaving work, since I think, well, I could probably do another week...but my sub has been here all week and I told him that I'd be gone starting Monday. I'm sick of school since it is the last week of the marking period and I've been going nuts with grading and just getting everything as prepared and settled as I can. But every day at school is a little bit of a battle. I'm working from 7 to about 5, then a couple of hours of work at home...I'm just so tired right now! I can't sleep most nights and I'd take naps if I had time. Watch, as soon as I stop working, I'll be able to sleep fine.

Baby stuff

2006-10-29T18:39:00.000-05:00

At my last baby shower, the one at school, it was the only shower where everyone knew the gender of the baby. I specifically wanted some clothes, and I was not disappointed! Here are the clothes I got!

I especially like the squirrel sleeper, the formal black coat, the little sweater, and "shake it" onsie with a rattle on it!

Here is the playpen with Hobbes, who decided it was a nice place to sleep.

Pregnancy picture

2006-10-27T19:05:00.000-04:00

Last weekend Dave and I took some nice pictures. Here is one:

Getting screwed by STD

2006-10-24T20:02:00.000-04:00

No, I don't mean a sexually transmitted disease...STD is the abbreviation for Short term disability. Something I signed up for two years ago to take care of maternity leave. Apparently, I didn't get the whole story about how it works.

I had to elect an 8 or 28 day "waiting period". When I asked insurance lady what the waiting period was, she said you wait to get your check on the 8th day or the 28th day. So why is it a different amount taken out of my check? She says because some people really the need the check at the beginning of the month, or the end of the month. So I get the same amount? "Yep."

I called MESSA to make sure I understood what needed to be done and how STD works...looks like the waiting period means you WAIT that long before you are ELIGIBLE for STD. So for a standard 6 week maternity leave, I'd wait 28 days (4 weeks) before being eligible to get my check...which would only be for two weeks.

So I'm sort of screwed. I can use sick days, though I've been using them and donating them for two years because I thought I had STD and didn't need to worry about days. So I only have 17.

What's more is that apparently every year I was supposed to ask them to up my amount...of course I didn't know this and so my benefit (of which I'm only entitled to two weeks) will be based on my first years salary that is 10,000 less than I make now.

I'm pretty pissed about it, but I know that we'll be okay, the baby will have clothes, etc. But the insurance lady should have the right info, should help people understand that info and make good decisions. Despite evidence to the contrary, I'm not an idiot; I wouldn't sign up for disability knowing that I'd be getting a mere two weeks worth! I am losing money on this overall, and what is worse is that since "open enrollment" is over, I have to keep paying all year, knowing I'm getting screwed!

In other news, I saw the doctor yesterday (appointments weekly now) and all seems well. Good blood pressure, weight, and fundus measure. Supposedly I still have about 3 weeks left...but I have always felt that I'd be done the second week of November.

I'm so excited...a few things left to do. Still have to buy nursing gown, pack hospital bags, put up some hooks in the babies room. Of course the house is a disaster, but I will say my sweet spouse has been pretty darn helpful with stuff. I just need to get some vacuuming done and a little organizing. It seems like I can't get my dining room table clear; there is always something!

Oh, and I have some pictures I'd like to post. But somehow every week is so darn busy...and weekends I am busy, too! Gotta make time for important stuff, like blogging :-)

Reduced foot size and worry

2006-10-18T21:16:00.000-04:00

On Sunday I called Dr. Andy to ask about the whole toxemia and preeclampsia thing. He made me feel better, as usual. What do pregnant people who don't have Dr. Andy do?? Apparently the swollen feet was taken off the list of symptoms for preeclampsia since it is so darn common amongst preggos. He said to beware of significantly swollen hands and face. Also, of course protein in pee (can't test that at home) and blood pressure (again, can't test at home). He said to monitor salt, but really the baby is pressing on the venous return and that is what is making me puff out. So instead of "putting up feet", try to lay on my side to take pressure off back.

My feet are slightly better, my right one went down andthe left one is still a little puffy. At the doctor yesterday my pee test came out fine and blood pressure is 109/70 (same as usually and quite good). My belly (fundus) measures right where it is supposed to. Weight gain is in the right window. Unfortunately, the doctor was once again called to L and D at the start of my appointment, so it was short. He took the strep B test and I'll get results next week.

I start weekly appointments now and the doc says if the baby comes now, we won't try to stop it. No kidding! This kid can "head out" any time now. But I do have mixed feelings...As much as I'm ready to have my body back, I am of course a little nervous about the rest of having a baby. Dave and I did the hospital tour last night and it went okay. Being in the delivery room made me a little nervous and pulse racy. Reminds me of shoulder surgery and the hysterics just before I went in. Must stay calm! Dave will help with that :-)

Last baby shower (work) tomorrow. Then a trip to babies R us and target to get the last bits that I think I need.

One small foot for woman, one giant foot for womankind

2006-10-15T11:06:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I was at Sara Wiles's baby shower and at the end, I looked down and my right foot seemed puffy. Upon closer inspection and comparrison to my left foot, I saw that it was indeed about twice the size it should be!

I knew that foot swelling was normal for the end of pregnancy, but it really threw me that it was only my right foot. Advice from non-doctor but knowledgable people included limiting salt intake, putting my feet up, and taking it easy. I tried to keep my foot up yesterday and today, but it is still puffy and uncomfortable. I think I need to talk to an actual doctor, but I did check the internet and it sort of scared me.

Apparently toxemia and preeclampsia (which are quite serious) occur in 5-7% of pregnancies and symptoms are swollen feet, headaches, sudden weight gain. Hmmm...sounds like me. And there is little to do about it. And of course I found a cite that claims that limiting salt intake is the worst thing to do because they'd actually cause water retention.

Today I ordered a belly-cast kit and I'm pretty excited to get it. I don't know I'd do with it when it is done, but I thought it'd be nice to have. I have only four more weeks (supposedly) so time is getting short. There are few things I still need to do before baby. SOme organizing and buying a few more things.

Seeing Jen's baby, Keira, helps me to be ready for little Charlotte to come:-)

It's a girl!

2006-10-12T20:35:00.000-04:00

The announcement is official: Dave and I are having a baby girl. We plan to name her Charlotte Jane Baker (unless I change my mind!). We're both excited and happy, though I really knew the whole time. I had a dream in March that I Mary had a boy, and Jen and I had girls and I was just sure of it. Dave had dreams it was a boy, though. The only baby dream I've had was that I had to sacrifice Dave for the baby to live- not very nice!

I decided a couple of weeks ago to finally share the news because sharing news is fun! I started at my shower in Cleveland thrown by Dave's family. I made sure the last gift I opened was one that I brought for the baby. It was the little dress I made this summer for her. So it was pretty clear when I opened the box what the gender way. Then the next weekend I told my mom and her family in the same way. I called Daddy and grandma Van then, too. But I couldn't tell anyone before my mom knew!

I'm glad we made that decision. It has been fun to talk about and I can finally say "she". She has hiccups all the time! Her head is down and she is in a good position! Also, we are so fortunate to have almost everything we need her. Now I just need to get clothes so she isn't naked all the time! I still have to pick out an outfit for her to wear home from the hospital.

October already!

2006-10-10T18:01:00.000-04:00

I guess I, too, haven't written in a while. I have ideas of stuff to write about...but it hasn't happened. Somehow I'm keeping pretty busy. What's new...

I can't believe it is October. I have just five more weeks. That is good because I'm getting sick of the pain in sleep. I know I won't sleep when the baby comes, but at least it doesn't hurt when you sleep!

I am still going to physical therapy. I go only once per week now. I had terrible pain about a week ago and took a day off work. I looked it up on the internet and found a condition called symphysis pubis dysfunction. Pretty sure that was what I had, the list of symptoms was like reading my mind! Terrible pain turning over in bed, can't stand on one leg, a bad waddle, etc. But when I asked my doctor, he said, "no, you don't have that". He was pretty short with me, which was irking, but I soon found out he had someone in L and D (labor and delivery) who was "going early". Next appointment I plan to talk to him more about it. I think he thought I was suggesting that I had symphysis pubis dystocia (which is where it actually separates- yikes!). I know that isn't it, my therapist has been treating me for dysfunction, where it slips up or down on one side or another.

But today he said that it seems even, though my saccrum is still somewhat torqued. I had to sit down all day since we gave the MEAP all darn day! I thought I'd get so much done, but all kinds of stuff comes up and I didn't do any planning! But I did grade some stuff, organize some stuff, and put out fires. I didn't actually have a prep period, but tomorrow I get two hours!! Yippee.

Babywise, I'm so damn excited!! Jen DiGennaro had her baby girl, Keira Rose, on Saturday evening. She was born 7 pounds 9 ounces, 19.5 inches long. It was a long and hard labor and Keira was delivered by cesarean but baby and mom are recovering well. I visited on Sunday night and now I'm just so eager for it to happen, it makes focusing on school tough. I have most of my showers done, just one at work is left. We are pretty well set on baby stuff. I used gift cards to buy the glider rocker, which I already love. I just like to go into the nursery and sit and dream. But not for too long, because then I start moving furniture around. I love the decor of the room, it is just sooooooo small! THe rocker does take up alot of room, too, so I'm trying to find a way that works well.

Dave is in Kentucky. But hopefully this is the last trip until a while after the baby. If I "go" early, I want daddy home with me!

Oh, my doctor put me on a diet when my weight started to sky-rocket, but I haven't gained any weight in the last three weeks, so it is fine. The weight wasn't even the problem, it was a just a very sudden and severe amount that he didn't want to continue until the end.

I need to take some pictures and post them, hopefully it will happen this week.

50 questions (with answers)

2006-09-24T18:53:00.000-04:00

1. First Name? Kater

2. Are you named after anyone? Not intentionally, when I was in my teens my dad found out I had lots of Katherine ancestors.

3. When did you last cry? At my baby shower (3 times).

4. Do you like your handwriting? No, but a student once told me it was nice, so I feel a little better about it. I like capital B's.

5. What is my favorite lunch meat? No meats right now...how about PBJ?

6. Kids? 8/9ths inside me now.

7. If you were another person would you be friends with you? Yes, though I think that would change me. I think I'd see the things that others might not like about me and then change a little.

8. Do you have a journal? Just this blog. I kept diaries in middle school and now they are just sad and embarassing.

9. Do you use sarcasm a lot? No, I'm too dumb.

10. Do you still have your tonsils? yes.

11. Would you bungee jump? Not a chance in hell.

12. What is my favorite cereal? European Muslix. I do love breakfasts in Germany. Rolls, meats, cheeses, jellys and such, yogurt. I was never dissapointed with German fruestuck.

13. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Always! I wear shoes really tight.

14. Do you think you are strong? In spirit, but not body.

15. What is your favorite ice cream? Moosetracks.

16. Shoe size? 9 (kind of 9.5 right now, though).

17. Red or pink? Pink.

18. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? I don't show the people I love how much I love them enough. I think about it... but it doens't usually happen.

19. What do you miss the most? Being proud of my dad.

20. Do you want everyone to do this also? Yes, I'd love to read this from anyone, including complete strangers.

21. What colour of pants and shoes are you wearing? black sweats, no socks (my feet are cold but I don't feel like going all the way upstairs).

22. Who is your favorite writer/book/movie?
King, Steven
A prayer for Owen Meany/ Surely You're joking Mr. Feynmann
American Beauty

23. What are you listening to right now? Alot of NPR

24. If you were a crayon what colour would you be? I always felt sorry for "cornflower", it just never seems vibrant enough and that no one would want to use it. Sometimes I feel like that.

25. What are your favorite smells? Autumn, spring, food.

26. Who was the last person you spoke with on the phone? My aunt called to see if I left a jacket at her house.

27. The first thing that you notice about people that you are attracted to? Wit.

28. Do you like the person who sent this to you? I really like the person to whom I am responding, I married him.

29. Favorite drink? Gin and tonic or Mojito.

30. Favorite sport? I don't care for sports in general, but I do like football more than others and can tolerate much more of it.

31. Hair colour? Light Brown.

32. Eye colour? Light Blue.

33. Do you wear contacts? No, I always wanted to wear glasses but my darn vision is perfect!

34. Favorite food? Manicotti (my mom's), fresh bread (my mom's), sugar.

35. Scary movie or happy endings? I like both, but scary gives me nightmares.

36. Last movie you watched? LA Confidential

37. Colour of the shirt you are wearing? light blue.

38. Winter of summer? Summer.

39. Hugs or kisses? Usually neither, I tend to be very physically unaffectionate (much to the chagrin of my spouse).

40. What is your favorite dessert? chocolate anything and a coffee.

41. Who is most likely to respond? Only KzooJason has yet to do this and I suppose he will not.

42. Who is least likely to respond? See 41.

43. What books are you reading? Nothing, I need to get to the library ASAP!

44. What is on your mouse pad? I do not have one. The optical mice of today no longer require one.

45. Favorite sounds? The cat's purr is pretty nice, but I really like my husband saying nice things to me.

46. What's that on the telly? He's watching football.

47. Rolling Stones or The Beatles? The Beatles.

48. The furthest you've been from home? I have not done the math but Rome may be farther than Vienna. Those would be the canidates though.

49. Do you have a special talent? I can hardly tell a lie...disgusting honesty that isn't usually appreciated or helpful.

50. When and where were you born? I was born in Muskegon, MI July 30, 1976.

Baby Blues

2006-09-24T18:17:00.000-04:00

Here I am, about 33 weeks pregnant, and I don't know how I"ll make it to November! The last three weeks have been very tough. I can't believe how UNCOMFORTABLE I am. I didn't think I'd feel this way until I had only a couple of weeks left. You can deal with almost anything for a couple of weeks. But this is harder than I thought. I have alot more respect not just for mothers, but for anyone who has been pregnant. Sleeping is a nightmare...it just doesn't happen anymore! I wake up several times a night, but not just to pee. My hips hurt. My legs cramp up. My ribs hurt. My back hurts. I'm hungry. Last week there was a night I got 6 hours of sleep in a row and it made such a difference!

But Friday night was miserable. I woke up every 45 in-1 hour. I was in lots of pain. I couldn't get comfortable. About 6 am. I was up and decided to pee since I was already awake. I step into the hall and into a giant pile of cat vomit! It squished through my toes and oozed onto the top of my foot. I started crying and hobbled down the hall trying not to make a trail of cat puke. With great difficulty, I hoisted my foot into the sink to rinse it. I came back and cleaned up the mess (cat puke stains horribly and there is still a faint orange mark) and got back into bed, sobbing.

My husband asked what was wrong and the crying continued. I tried to set up my pillows to sleep sitting up and slept a couple more hours. Then I rushed off to my baby shower hosted by my dad's family. They did a really nice job and I think it was exactly what I needed that day. When I walked in, they asked how I was, and I broke into tears (this is after I told myself the whole way that I didn't need to go into my crummy morning at the shower). It was really nice to be surrounded by people who cared and who knew exactly what I was talking about! I felt much better. More tears came when I opened gifts. I used to hate baby stuff, but I guess my hormones (and my heart) make me see it in a different light. What really got me was a book called "daddy kisses" and a book that my sister gave me of Beatrix Potter stories, which my mom always collected and read to us.

I'm excited to meet my baby, to see what personality the baby has. I can't wait to see what this baby looks like! Me? Dave? Neither of us? Curly hair or straight? What color eyes and hair? My carrier is so...secondary now. But I"m just ready to have my body back and get started raising this bugger!

I have made two e-bay purchases. I got the dansko clogs and the seller gave me $20 bucks back, which was good because they were more worn that what the picture looked like (touched up with black marker, too). But I think they are comfy and for a net total of $40, not too bad. I also bought a visualizer, or opaque projector camera, for my classroom. I hope to be reimbursed by grant money, but I think it is worth it to have such a great teaching tool. I got it for $225 when they go for $1300 new. I'm eager to get it and make sure it works!!

Back in the saddle again

2006-09-10T20:01:00.000-04:00

One week of school down, nine more left before my maternity leave. I'm feeling good, now. Not so much a couple of weeks ago. My girlfriends threw me an awesome baby shower on the 26th. After that I went up north with the gang for kayaking and camping. That was really fun. I had an air mattress and other than the usual very difficult time turning over, sleeping wasn't so bad. It was fun to have Nathan and Sara there with all their camping expertise and accoutrements. Then on Sunday we kayaked for about 5 hours. I thought I might not look pregnant to people on the river since I was sitting down and my belly hidden. HA! HA! Looking at pictures just makes me giggle since it is soooo clear that I have a giant preggie belly. I'm okay with it, I did wear my bikini after all. I just didn't realize how big I was.

Or how tired I'd be on Monday! Crabby from tired and having to go back to work. School started for teachers that Tuesday and we had a three day inservice at a local church. We weren't even in our buildings to sneak away and get anything done. The first day I felt pretty good. But by the end of Wednesday I was in tears! My lower back was killing me. I figured it was just the pain of pregnancy and tried to treat it with some hot "Oma's kirschstiensack" (a bag a cherry pits from Germany that you put in the microwave to heat up). I wanted massage, but my insurance covers massage therapy only if paired with chiropractic treatment. Which I DON'T like (not the HVLA stuff). So I called my doc and he set up an appointment with a physical therapist.

Then on Monday, at prenatal yoga, my instructor helped me out with some muscle energy therapy and I felt way better. But I still kept my therapy appointment and felt a little bad when I went since I was "better". But the therapist watched me walk and noted that I was favoring one leg and we discovered that my saccrum was torqued and my pelvis out of alignment. He spent about 1.5 hours with my Wednesday, then I saw him again for 30 minutes Friday, though I felt way better on Friday. I have an appointment on Tuesday, but I"m feeling so much better in general, I hope that by continuing to go I can prevent any problems from returning.

I also found that I felt crummy at school because my clothes didn't fit. I didn't wan to get up in front of the kids because my shirt is scooching up, my pants are saggind down, my belly is hanging out, and I waddle (yes, people feel free to tell you how "cute" your waddle is). I have learned alot about being rude. Just because it is true does not mean you have to share it. So I bought a pair of khaki pants (that actually fit!) and a couple of other things. I'm also trying to buy a pair of dansko shoes on ebay- my first ever ebay purchase if it works. Wish me luck, only an hour left on my bid.

100 Things about me

2006-08-28T20:31:00.000-04:00

1. I love my husband more each year we are married.
2. I think my know-it-all attitude is supposed to compensate for all the years I thought I was of low intelligence and ability.
3. I didn't think I was smart until about halfway through 10th grade.
4. I regret spending so much time with boyfriends in high school instead of with my friends.
5. I'm fascinated with running water (like the cats), especially rivers and streams but includes spring melting.
6. Someimes I'm afraid my husband isn't going to be faithful even though I cheated on him (in 1997, before we were married or engaged!)
7. I always wanted dance lessons but got cello and bassoon lessons instead.
8. I don't think I'm patient enough for teaching middle school.
9. I wish I had continued with physics after my undergrad, but went into teaching because I didn't think I was capable.
10. I can't believe that I'll love my baby more than my cats or husband!
11. I'm extremely messy even though my mother worked really hard to make me neat and clean.
12. I'm afraid my baby will have cognitive impairment and that I won't love it as much.
13. I love chocolate, but prefer white cake to chocolate cake most of the time.
14. I have a reputation for having an enormous appetite.
15. I love cross-country skiing.
16. I think I'm an excellent whistler.
17. I can't make that really loud whistle and wish I could.
18. I'm a terrible slow runner.
19. In high school track everyone had three events, but they told me to just do two (because I'm that bad).
20. I'm extrememly proud of bellydancing since I have no other athletic talents.
21. I watch children's movies and cartoon movies and don't usually enjoy them but watch them anyway.
22. I have terrible taste in picking out movies.
23. I watch lots of really bad movies.
24. I have only walked out of a move once: Singles.
25. I have not finished a few movies that I rented, including: Legally Blonde 2, date movie, and caligula.
26. The fist career I wanted was to be a paleontologist.
27. I'm proud of being a nerd.
28. I always wanted to wear glasses but my vision is persistently good.
29. I love NPR.
30. I download podcasts of Wait, Wait, don't tell me.
31. I like to think I'm technilogically savvy, but without my husband I couldn't even blog.
32. I think other people think I'm too blunt but I'm proud of being genuine.
33. I love gin and tonics and mojitos in addition to wine.
34. I love being pregnant.
35. I love how it feels when the baby moves, even when it has the hiccups and is slightly irritating.
36. I think people who smoke are crazy and don't understand how stopping could be harder than continuing something so gross.
37. I like politics but have to be careful not to get too riled up.
38. I thnk I'm open minded, but must be confronted with credible evidence before changing my mind.
39. I can admit when I'm wrong since it happens so much.
40. I'm afraid of worms.
41. I'm not afraid of spiders, but occasionally think they are creepy.
42. I'm good at remembering numbers.
43. I'm terrible at remembering names.
44. I am not good at remembering faces.
45. I wonder if my hearing is compromised, I often can't hear what people are saying if there is background noise.
46. I think I look like a man and try to wear earrings when my hair is pulled back.
47. I don't think my mom really likes me, even though I know she loves me. I'm too different from her.
48. I think my dad likes me, but I think he's sort of crazy so I don't know what that means.
49. I am often surprised that my husband loves me, but would never ask why because I don't want him to realize there aren't any good reasons.
50. I wish I had more friends, but I don't often meet people I really like that much.
51. I thought thinking of 100 things would be easy...but it is actually pretty hard.
52. I love to make things.
53. I love working with my hands.
54. I like to figure out problems and why things are broken.
55. I have worked as a waitress at two restaurants.
56. I worked at the paper mill for one summer.
57. I worked with the United Way for one summer.
58. I worked at Family Video for one year before being fired.
59. I worked at Redi Rental for years.
60. I worked as an RA in college but was not asked to return the following year.
61. I worked as a night receptionist from 3 am to 7 am in college.
62. When I lived alone after getting pseudofired from my RA job, my food budget was $3 a day.
63. I am cheap when it comes to spending money on others.
64. I cry helplessly at the movie "Rudy".
65. The thing that makes me cry in any movie is when one person sacrifices something for someone else (Rudy can have my position, coach).
66. I don't like babies very much, but love kids.
67. I really enjoy camping but my husband and I just camped for the first time together and probably won't get another chance to for a while.
68. I hate mornings and I am super crabby then.
69. I don't like dogs at all.
70. I think pet birds are stupid and gross.
71. I love french toast.
72. I waxed my underarms once in college.
73. I don't pay enough attention when I drive.
74. I love watching project runway and entourage.
75. I dislike Elizabeth on "The View".
76. I don't like popcorn and icecream as much as most people.
77. I always order the same menu item at most restaurants but it isn't the same at each place.
78. I can't usually drink a whole can of pop.
79. My parents didn't let me chew gum until I was about 10, and then not really.
80. I wanted Michael Jackson to adopt me when I was young.
81. I was afraid of the toilet when I was young and had nightmares about it.
82. I also had nightmares about a leprachaun filling my bedroom with my mom's loaves of home made wheat bread.
83. I love wheat bread now.
84. I always read at least one sentence before bed.
85. I sleep with a pillow under my head and one on top of it.
86. I love sleeping on my back, but am not supposed to in pregnancy.
87. My husband and I have separate comforters and it works wonderfully!
88. I could eat mayonaise out of the jar with a spoon I like it so mcuh.
89. I keep bags of chocolate chips in my cupboard for a snack.
90. I love the rain and occasionally stand in it just enjoying.
91. I love spring and watching the plants come up.
92. I like autumn but am usually too busy to really enjoy it.
93. I love family get-togethers and wish I lived closer to my family.
94. I love sailing.
95. I love swimming, but my doctor says I shouldn't unless I want another shoulder surgery.
96. one of my favorite songs is "under pressure" by david bowie and queen.
97. I like to drive fast, but hate jetskiis, snowmobiles, or atv's.
98. I'm a leo and think it fits me pretty well.
99. My middle name is Elaine and I really like it.
100. I like talking about myself.

End of Summer Report

2006-08-24T08:51:00.000-04:00

Tasks accomplished:
1. Guest room reorganized and cleaned, including closet and bureau, and mopped floor (including under bed)
2. Closet cleaned and reorganized
3. Drawers cleaned and reorganized
4. Skinny clothes packed, maternity unpacked and labeled with owner initials
5. Baby's room cleaned out, teacher stuff packed up
6. Baby's room painted, including dresser/changing table
7. Made curtains and bassinett ruffle for baby's room
8. Cut, nailed, and painted baseboards and moulding in basement (including framing in and around windows)
9. Watched and helped husband hang suspended ceiling in basement :-)
10. Cleaned out workout room after it was used for a dumping ground for projects.
11. Cleaned out and reorganized all kitchen cabinets and drawers
12. re-caulked bathtub and restored tiles for former glory (including scouring shower caddy)
13. Put in new lock and deadbolt on house
14. Cleaned out laundry room
15. Cleaned out mechanical room
16. Set up math binders (for 16 units, included typed up labels for dividers for each lesson)
17. Painted hallway downstairs
18. Stained and polyurethaned doors for basement
19. Cleaned carpet in upstairs bathroom and entryway
20. Sewed two baby outfitsand learned alot about sewing

Scorecard:
Sick days: 1
Toga parties: 1
Days spent with niece and nephew: 6
beers: 3 (no, not at the same time)
trips sailing: 2
days at the beach: 3
Gallons of bleach used: 1
Pounds Gained: about 20
Speeding tickets: 1

I have to go back officially Tuesday, August 29. That is the end of a great summer :-)

Bad Boys, Bad boys, Whatcha Gonna Do?

2006-08-19T09:38:00.000-04:00

I'm pretty well-known among friends for being a scaredy-cat. When I was in my super running phase in college I would often go out late at night and after dark. Friends would show concern for my safety and my reply was always that I was more afraid of trolls or ghosts or the supernatural than some robber/rapist type person. I often forget to lock the doors at night, and even if Dave is away it doesn't really bother me. Well, I think that is changing. There were two incidents this week convincing me that I'm not in NM anymore.

The first happened during my sewing frenzy. I was happily sewing a little dress when I hear pounding on a door and someone say "this is bounty hunter, open up or it'll be knocked down". When I looked out the window I was relieved to find that he wasn't at MY door, but at the house next door (not on the driveway side). This is about 20 feet from the window of the room I was sewing in. This guy was wearing a black T-shirt that said "Bounty Hunter", had a giant flashlight, was bald and tatooed and generally menacing. I snuck out the front to cross the street to see what was going on better and see if the neighbor knew what was going on. She said said that next door lady's son must have done something wrong. Now, said son has heretofore been just generaly annoying. Mid 20's, lives with mom, people come to pick him up or drop him off late at night with loud rap music blaring These people also have some fear of getting out of their vehicles, because they just honk the horn. Alot. A few weeks ago, when it was unusually hot there was a man banging on the door wanting to install air conditioning and loser-son forgot/slept through it and so they were charged an extra $100 bucks and couldn't get air for another week (it was the hottest days of the summer). Anyway, I didn't even realize bounty hunters were real. This means that loser-son must have been arrested and jumped bail (this is the postulate of the other neighbor lady's son who looks as if he might be familiar with this situation).

I wasn't ever afraid of my neighborhood before, but it seemed just a little scarier knowing that not only was the next door neighbor a criminal at some level, but a bail-jumping criminal (which is indeed much worse in my opinion).

The second incident happened last night/this morning at 4 am. I usually wake up pretty easily, but I'm not sure what it was that awakened me. I looked out our bedroom window because I must have heard noise. There was some confused yelling, what looked like someone running across and into the back yard. Flashlights swinging wildly. Light over garage clicks on. At this point, Dave wakes up. Not because he heard anything, but becuase I was up and moving around trying to look out the window from the bed. He asked what was going on, I replied that there were people in our backyard and flashlights. Then into the light from the garage steps a figure. A policeman. I threw on my robe and run down to the side door where there is s cop car in the driveway and four cops and a k-9 unit (pretty dog). I asked what happened and after making some crack about me serving them breakfast, they said that someone stole a car, crashed it on the streed behind ours, and ran through our yard. He was apprehended in our yard in the back corner behind the garage.

Then I couldn't sleep for about two hours (Dave of couse was back to sleep quickly) but I eventually nodded off again around 6. This morning I went outside to see what happened. By my pond I have a little statue that was knocked down, and the lily pads are in a different position. I think he climbed the fence and landed in the pond. There is also a shirt (size 2x) laying on the ground there. Did he take it off to be harder to see or because it was all ponded up? In the back corner the top of one of the fence pieces is sort of broken off. He apparently had a hard time getting over the fence.

I think I'll make sure the doors are locked all the time now. Is our neighborhood unsafe?

Done with Jen's Baby's outfit!

2006-08-16T20:43:00.000-04:00

I almsot don't want to give this away, I want to carry it with me so that I can show people how cute it is!! Cookie monster isn't the ideal model, but I figure he approximated a three month old baby (except for his neck, which I'm pretty sure is way to big for babies). the jacket is a ribbed knit material that will keep baby cozy. I think you can click the pics to see larger ones. The colors may seem untraditional, but I think Jen already has about 800 pink dresses. I like that this one is more fall/winter color oriented and is a nice change from pink and purple.

Feeling quite proud of myself

2006-08-16T11:28:00.000-04:00

Monday I woke up and thought: just this one last free week before school obligations bring me back. I'll just relax.

Then a few hours went by and I was BORED! So I thought I'd use up some of hte excess material from the bassinett and make burp clothes or something. Then I went to the fabric store where there was a sale on everything! So I bought a pattern and some material and had the ladies help me find the notions to match. At first I was going to get two patterns, one for my baby and one for Jen's baby girl. But I didn't want to purchase material for the pattern I chose for my baby because the lady said I needed a stretchy fabric and I thought I should start with a simpler, non-stretchy one. i've never sewn from a pattern before, but I figured that since it's a pattern, its like following a recipe and you can't really go wrong.

Wrong. I probably spent an hour just reading the directions trying to make sense of them. I couldn't get ahold of my mom to ask questions and I really didn't know what I was doing and what alot of terms meant. But I figured I'd start and maybe the rest would start to make sense. It did.

I might have spent two hours on the sleeves (hey, they had gathers AND elastic and they are so super tiny sewing on them was ridiculous).By the time husband came home I was mostly done, just the buttons and holes were left. I felt so good, we went back to the store to buy material for the jacket. Then we came home and had dinner and about 9pm I figured i"d finish it off.

Wrong again. Spent about an hour and half doing three buttonholes. I had a lot of thread explosion and I kept rethreading the machine and practicing on another piece on which everything went fine, then I'd do on the actual material and SPROING thread everywhere. This morning I was up for the challenge again, and did the other 4 holes in about ten minutes and the buttons went well, and it is DONE! here it is:

And here is the picture from the pattern. You can see what the jacket looks like:

So I learned many things (including that if you are going to put in elastic, don't sew the pocket closed, what "finshing an edge" means, how to do buttonholes, how to do buttons properly, and that tiny things are a b**** to sew). Back to work!

A day at the beach

2006-08-13T20:29:00.000-04:00

Today we spent a lovely day at the beach. I had suggested that we do this and my husband was at first hesitant since he just came home and wanted the laying around the house that is necessary for relaxing. But he capitulated and we left around quarter to 11:00. We got to the beach at about noon and went down to the part in NM where you don't have to pay the state park fee. It was actually much nicer there since there was a short walk to the shore. Down at the pay area it feels like you have to walk a mile to get to the water. And if you forget something, walking back makes you so HOT and takes forever.

The key to our trip being so great was the hole. I found that laying at the beach is somewhat uncomfortable for a 7 months pregnant person. Not really supposed to lay on back, can't lay on front. So at when I was at the beach last time I dug a hole to put my belly into, thinking that I'd lay on belly. But that didn't work so well. So this time I dug a nice trench for my bootie. Then I took the partially inflated beach ball for a back pillow. This basically made a "craftmatic adjustable beach chair". It was perfect. We didn't even get burned, but got a nice layer of tan.

The water was cool, but refreshing. The waves were quite large with a strong riptide, but it was more fun that way. We swam a few times, built a little sandcastle, and read a little. We also walked along the beach. Then we got home with plenty of time to make a nice dinner, clean up around the house, and watch a movie.

We watched "V for Vendetta". I highly recommend this film. About ten mintues into it I said to Dave, "I like this movie" and he noted that it has only been ten mintues. But it really captured my interest. Good acting, good costume/scenery, good dialogue, good plot. I'm usually too distractable to just watch a movie. But I really watched the whole thing without doing anything else. That's a good sign.

The frenzy continues

2006-08-11T19:07:00.000-04:00

After I got my kitchen looking good, I had to pretty much vacuum the rest of the house (finally). I didn't want to track dirt into my pristine kitchen! Then I started on the bathroom. I re-caulked the tub, which is indeed lots of work. I was jammed into the bathtub (big belly and all) and about every 30 seconds I'd get a leg cramp and have to change position. Apparently leg cramps are a common pregnancy thing. That old caulk was TOUGH to get off. As I finally scraped it off, I carefully bleached the hell out of the tub praying that no mold would make it, then I applied the new stuff. Of course, the tube, which was old, busted and there was a big caulky mess on my hands (literally) and I had to run to the store to buy more. Well, when that was set I couldn't help but notice how dirty the floor was and I proceeded to bleach the hell out of that, too. I love bleach. Then I decided I needed no-bake cookies. In the middle of these I found I only had about 1 tablespoon of cocoa, so I had to go to the store for that, too. I came back, finished the cookies and well, they are gone now :-). This was all on Wednesday.

On Thursday, I had the misfortune of waking up quite early. If I don't eat a small meal before bed, I have a hard time sleeping and wake up out of hunger (now I now how babies feel). I rolled back and forth for about an hour and finally at 6 I just got up. This is nice, it makes for quiet and cool morning, but I had planned on running errands and nowhere is open at that ungodly hour. So I tromped downstairs and peeked in at the totally destroyed laundry room. Yep, gotta clean that too.

My husband has loads of beer stuff and I reorganized that and put everything into bins. I put all my wine stuff into a bin also (which I believe had been done before and then someone raided it). I found a bin of teaching stuff. I thought all of that had been moved into the attic, whoops. I cleaned out the paint cupboard (mostly just put away the cans I've been using all summer), mounted a wine rack, moved some stuff around and generally cleared the place out. It is now a much nicer place for my husband to do laundry.

Then I went into the "mechanical room". I don't know why dave calls it that, it is just the furnace room to me. That was even worse! You could hardly enter the room, let alone find anything in there. So I went to town in there. I ended up saving about 100 wine bottles and I'll have to get rid of about 50. When I was making wine on a regular basis, I asked people for bottle. Boy, do they deliver! Now that I haven't made wine in about a year (actually, more like a year and half), the bottles really build up. My next wine will be a port and I'll have to make that soon if I want it ready for when the baby comes!

I threw away loads of trash, moved boxes to the garage to be broken down, etc. I pulled out the small strip of carpet that was apparently the target of cat pee and bleached the floor underneath. I even replaced the furnace filter and added a scented thing that is supposed to smell up your whole house with fresh smell. I figure that is probably better than the bleach smell that is sure to overwhelm people when they enter.I got this all done by about noon. So I took a nap and then ran all my errands.

Today I had breakfast with ladies from work, caught up on what's going on and then went to school. I did a minimal amount of planning and headed home where I....didn't feel like working! I guess I found the end of it. Well, there isn't much really for me to do left. I'm considering putting in more shelves in the linen closet (we don't have good space for storing blankets). My garden of course looks terrible and I should attack that with the same vigour that hit my house. But it doesn't so much seem worth it. Not this late in the year.

The good news is that Dave comes home tomorrow :-) He'll go back to CA probably on Wednesday, but it'll be nice to see him. Only one week left before school responsibility starts again. I gotta make some beach time!

Nesting or just cleaning like normal people: you decide

2006-08-08T17:49:00.000-04:00

As my other projects wind down I'm left with some "free" time before school starts. With my hubby in California I try to keep busy so I don't get as lonely. One of the things I've been meaning to do is make room in my kitchen for baby stuff. The drawers and cupboards were all packed and surely there are things I could get rid of to make room.

When you start a project like this, you should know that it will invariably lead to more. After cleaniing up one cupboard, I decided to move some stuff to a different cupboard. Uh-oh, that one needs cleaning and reorganizing, too. Before you know it, you're going full throttle with every pantry item and dish spread out as the cupboards get organized. I went through EVERY one. My husband will need a map when he gets home; I changed the location of many things also.

I made a big pile of junk that isn't necessary and moved it to the basement (the bad news is that organizing the basement is one of my next jobs...move it to the garage?). I also found myself scouring every surface. Top of the fridge. Side of the stove. Under the dishwasher handle. It is a good thing though, because that level of cleaning hasn't been done in the last five years or so. I mean, I'll clean well a couple of times a year, but not with all the reorganizing. Oh, then I finished by scrubbing the floor on my hands and knees. i'm tired!

Maybe I was inspired because my darling husband thoughfully straighted the house for me so that when I came home Sunday night even the bed was made! Maybe since I didn't have to worry about the straightening I was able to focus on the real cleaning.

My next job: I think I'll re-caulk the tub. Nesting or not? What do you think?

Summer draws to a close with lovely days

2006-08-06T08:26:00.000-04:00

This past week has been nice. With no major projects to occupy me, I was afraid I fall into the spiral of depressing boring solitude. Luckily, with my husband home, I had some interaction with other people and did accomplish things while at the same time relaxing.

I went into school a few days. I rearranged my student desks and rearranged my desk. I pretty much made it so that my teacher desk is right in front and I could go from my desk to the overhead project without getting out of my rolly chair. THis sounds lazy, but as a 6 month pregnant woman is not going to get less pregnant, I see it as an investment in my own future. Now is not the time to try for "Teacher of the Year". I'll be working instead towards, "Teacher who made it for 10 weeks". I also did some compulsive working. I'm a retentive binder freak. THis means that each unit I teach gets a binder. In science, the binder is huge and I just sort of pull stuff I like out and rearrange a little each year. In math, however, the lessons are pretty laid out so it required a divider for each lesson. Also, since our math curriculum is new next year, that was plenty to prepare. Oh, and I'm doing two grades of math. So 16 units had to be prepared with binders, dividers with lesson numbers and names printed from computer, natch, and smancy cover sheets and side labels. Oh, and tearing up the teacher books so that each lesson is in the right section. I'm glad I got this stuff done, but loads of things hang over my head. I still have a reasonable three weeks to get things under control, but the though of going back to school is sad indeed.

I was supposed to go with my sister to the Binder Park Zoo on Thursday, (they have giraffes!) but we got rained out (so I went to school again that day, instead).

On Friday, my mom came and we got a couple of nice big things from the baby store and had lunch. After lunch, mom left and I went home with Dave. About 60 seconds after we parted ways, I realized that my car keys were in mom's car! I then proceeded to dig through my purse frantically, papers flying everywhere (Dave was driving and he got pelted with receipts and what-not) as I'm cursing like a sailor dropping the F-bomb and adding some "mother"s to various words. I get out my new pretty cell phone and try to call mom. Oh, even though Dave has been reminding me to transfer my contacts for the last three days, I haven't done it. So then I'm madder (at me) and call siblings asking for mom's cell number. They both say, "Mom has a cell phone?".
Meanwhile, Dave is driving north on Beltline trying (in vain) to catch up with mom who isn't known for being a speedster. By the time we get to the highway, we've given up pursuit and I realize that I just went atomic for NO REASON! Could I get into my house? Yes, we had Dave's keys and the spare. Could I drive my car? Yes, Dave has my spare. Was there anything else I needed? No. Was I going to Muskegon anyway Satureday AND Sunday? yes, I could just get them back. Dave informed me that I was OFF his "Disaster Team" (by the way, Roland, you never made it in the first place...something about a hammer in your wife's face). I was so ashamed. I can't believe I totally freaked out. And my poor husband who was assaulted with purse contents as well as language I'm sure he doesn't want to hear coming out of his sweet wife's mouth. I'm going to blame it on pregnancy hormones, since they pretty much make you insane most of the time.

Saturday was a better day. Dave and I headed for Muskegon at about 10 am and planned a day at the beach. My sister and her kids were going to meet us and we were in the water when Dave looks up the beach and says, I think your sister and her kids are here. What does he see? On the horizon we see one child (gender unknown) with bright orange swimmies swinging arms like a monkey and running crazily toward the water in one direction. There is another smaller child holding nothing, but wearing a mysterious blue full-body-suit that is puffy crazily running the other direction toward the water. I mention that it's probably not Beth since she's nowhere around. Dave claims this is just further evidence that it indeed little Sophia and Sam. Sure enough, they approach closer and it is them. A few moments later, said sister lugs the rest of the beach stuff down to us. It was a fun day. Sophia is a fish and Sam tolerated the water much better. Uncle Dave was loads of fun and was busy launching Sophia in the water.

We came home around 5 pm and met up with Jen Flanigan who was bursting with excitement about her new purchase: Ipod 30 gig video. Dave was equally excited (if not more so). I was simply starving. We ate out at BW3's (I know there is no more 3) and that was okay. I missed getting a couple of blue moons, that was one of my favorite things to do with Dave. Then we came home and I made tapioca and chocolate chip cookies while Dave showed Jen his new computer and gave her some ipod lessons. I think they both enjoyed this. Meanwhile I ate only two cookies, but had two full glasses of milk and then thought I just might split into two.

The new pregnant experience is alternately starving and bursting. My usually food storage space has been compromised by baby (my uterus is apparently the size of a soccer ball now) and so I'll eat and then 15 minutes later start moaning about how full I am. I also start belching uncontrollably. Some people do this anyway, but I'm not much of a burper. Dave used to tease me that my burps were so wussy. Not anymore. Unfortunately, last night I didn't have cookie burps, it was hot wing burps. Not as nice the second time. But I love hot food anyway.

I have a family reunion in Muskegon today, so more beach :-) but Dave flies out to California today so he won't be joining me. This week is really the danger week with no projects and no Dave. So friends, give me lots to do and make many posts on blogs!

Ultra sound pics

2006-07-31T21:31:00.000-04:00

We had our ultrasound on July 6, and I almost forgot about posting it, or trying to. Tough to get a close up pic that is in focus and doesn't have a big flash bright spot. So here is a pic:

And a closer up pic: I totally think this baby has Dave's jawline, or at least Dave's Mom's jawline.

And here is Hobbes making himself at home in the bassinett we are borrowing from Dave's sister:

Birthday at Sea

2006-07-30T21:05:00.000-04:00

Today is my birthday and we went with a maritime theme. Yesterday we went to Muskegon and I was treated to a great sail with cousin Frank (and then followed up with Chip Appreciation Day at the Marina). Today we saw "Pirates of the Caribbean II" and followed it up with dinner at Red Lobster. I liked the movie okay. As much as you can for a part II. I already knew 1) it was not a fully resolved ending as there is one more part to come and 2) there is a sci-fi aspect to it with crazy sea monster type stuff. So the chief complaints I heard from others are not mine. I thought it was just fine...I mean really, are you NOT going to see it? I did not, however, have a crazy experience with the popcorn and some dumb girl getting fired. That would have been more exciting.

There was a wonderful thunderstorm today and the temp dropped about 20 degrees (F). It was great, but Hobbes was scared out of his brain. He just crouched and slunk around hiding and didn't even want anyone petting him to comfort him.

Done! with the nursery

2006-07-29T08:08:00.000-04:00

The final touches on the baby's room were completed yesterday. I did the curtains and tie-backs earlier this week. The curtains I was a little disappointed with; I really should have made them about 5 inches longer so that when they got pulled back they still looked nice. But they were easy to make and increased my sewing confidence. For the tie-backs I got some wooden discs from Hobby Lobby for $1 and put the monkey stamp on them. I think that is cute.

The other project was the bassinett ruffle/liner. This was more daunting for me even though my sister gave me the old one that a friend of hers made her so I could use it as a pattern. It turned out beautifully! Unfortunately, in the pictures, a certain somebody decided that this new baby thing needed to be taken for a test drive and Calvin is, once again, in the baby's bed. I'm not too worried about this- he seems to like novelty more than anything else. He's already stopped going into the crib.
All in all, I'm quite pleased with the nursery. I'm thankful to the help of especially Beth and Susan and their guidance in things I don't know about. I'm having a better relationship with my Husky (sewing maching). We had some real conflicts in the past, but yesterday I came home from Field's at about 11:30, had lunch, and started working and was done by 3:00. That includes fixing minor errors...not bad math, just stupidness. I wouldn't say I'm "good" as sewing, but I might use the word competent for uncomplicated items.

Now I have to concentrate on school stuff, which I don't want to do, but come September, I'll be so glad if I get lots done.

Say hello to my leetle friend

2006-07-24T20:02:00.000-04:00

Last weekend I was unloading groceries from my trunk while my car was in the garage and out of the corner of my eye I saw a furry lump in the corner of the garage by the garage door. At first I thought it was a dead cat. So sad. But then I noticed that the tail was gross and rat-like. So it was an opossum. Dead? No, I saw it breathing slowly. At first I was afraid I'd scare him and he'd jump out and give me rabies or something. Then I realized that opossums are known for..."playing opossum". Then I felt better, but it was till gross. I had to close the big door since I went out of town for a few days, but I left the "people door" open a crack. He was, thankfully, gone when I returned home on Wednesday. I also looked up info about opossums (Dave wondered if he was hanging by his tail so I wondered if that was a myth) and learned all sorts. Apparently fully grown ones can't really support their weight with their tail, but they have been seen carrying things like bundled sticks with it. Also, they have a pretty low chance of rabies since their blood temp is really low. Anyway, here is my new friend, Opie.

On a completely unrelated note, I spent the day today with Laura and Jackson. We were going to go to the beach. We got rained on. We also got winded on. So we came home. I miss the beach.

Time flies when you're...having summer

2006-07-20T20:26:00.000-04:00

I can't believe how far into the summer it is! It is downright depressing to think of going back to school. I unfortunately checked my school email and found a message from around the 4th of July from a parent regarding her daughter's math grade. Are you kidding?? You are going to ask me about what was turned in, etc. in the middle of the damn summer? Where were you in May? Even June? And add to that, that her problem seems to be that the daughter said she turned stuff in, but it isn't showing in my gradebook. Hmm...maybe your 7th grade daughter is lying? Did you think of that? Especially since these parents are in two weeks after every marking period to bail out thier kids. Filled with anger even though it isn't even worth it to think about.

In other news, last weekend Dave's mom came to visit (if you read his blog, then you know a bit about that). Now I know where he gets his bizzare taste from. I say bizzare because he doesn't like much variety of food or things with real flavor for that matter. Who would have thought that someone would NOT like Italian food? I mean, I thought we couldn't go wrong. What does she like? She said crab and lobster. Well, if that doesn't happen for me, she's out of luck too. We did have a wonderful sail with Frank. And we had a great, but too short, day at the beach on Saturday. Can't wait to go back and do a proper whole day affair.

This week I was staying with a friend, who shall remain nameless but probably guessable, to take care of her after she had a pilanidal (sp?) cyst removed. That is about the grossest thing I've ever seen. Imagine a hole where your ass crack is, about 1.5 inches top to bottom, a half inch wide left to right, and almost an inch deep. Just a big open wound. Poor thing was a real trooper about it. Though the vicadin helps. I'd post pictures if she let me...and she might.

In the curtain department, I think that I've decided to simply choose the easiest path. No patterns, no extra tools, just a plain tabbed thing. I mostly just want to get it (and my other projects) done as soon as I can so I can maybe relax for a couple of weeks this summer.

In health news, I am feeling good pregnancy-wise. I have a bit of a cold, though. It peaked on Tuesday and Wednesday and I just "took it easy" today. Taking it easy is hard...I'm sick of laying around. Today was pretty lazy. I managed a two hour nap, but awoke due to Hobbe's snoring (he's so loud!). I finally left the house at 4pm and ran some errands. Now I just have to clean and put the house in order before Dave gets home. But I"m feeling much better tonight. And this baby...I decided to give it the Native American name "Kicking Bird".

I registered for baby stuff on Sunday and was quite fortunate to have my sister's help. There are alot of decisions to make. I hope we get alot of stuff because I had no idea so much was needed! I'm fortunate to have big family and great friends, so I probably will be all set by the time November comes around.

Baby Baker is here!

2006-07-14T21:58:00.000-04:00

Okay, well maybe not the real baby, but someone who thinks he is. He's pretty much in the crib for all naps now. And Hobbes? He likes the crib, too, but underneath.